The Long Dump Event
In This Episode...
Comedian Jamie Lissow and his hotter half Dr. Erika discuss why it takes so much time for some men to take dumps and if that means they're dying and Jamie has an altercation with his son's gym teacher.
About the Podcast
Comedian Jamie Lissow and his smarter half Dr. Erika answer all kinds of medical, dating, sex, divorce, questions some might be afraid to ask. Listen & subscribe for prescriptions and punchlines.
Mentioned in this episode:
Warning:
This is an uncensored podcast that will include adult language and topics. Viewer discretion is advised.
Transcript
check 1 2 well hello there boyfriend
Speaker:how are you this fine day
Speaker:I'm really good is it working
Speaker:yes excellent
Speaker:let's not touch shit
Speaker:I'm afraid to ask but I have a great question
Speaker:I don't even know what I was gonna say
Speaker:I'm so disturbed right now
Speaker:it's a hotel
Speaker:is it would you like to do a podcast my love
Speaker:I mean I'm I'm like so yeah haha
Speaker:this is afraid to ask
Speaker:and we're interrupting Erica's Instagram time
Speaker:it was a really cool video was really cool video
Speaker:I think you
Speaker:and I use social media in almost the healthiest way
Speaker:can possibly use it
Speaker:my Instagram is filled with motivational stuff
Speaker:it's filled with you know
Speaker:girls with huge tits
Speaker:gets a lot of stuff that gives me motivation and drive
Speaker:yeah exactly
Speaker:so this is afraid to ask
Speaker:and there's a bunch of different ways we could go here
Speaker:oh so I will should I start and play
Speaker:we be getting a lot of messages on Speak pipe
Speaker:that's how we get messages here speak pipe
Speaker:I'm afraid to ask and like that
Speaker:but I'm just randomly play one
Speaker:and we'll just get into sexual innuendo
Speaker:it's not every time this comes up
Speaker:you try to bring your side effects like it's
Speaker:I think it's a pipe I think it's like in a playground
Speaker:where you talking to one side
Speaker:and it comes out the other side oh really
Speaker:you go from me saying sexual to you
Speaker:going to like a kids playground
Speaker:that's what I think it is thanks
Speaker:all right I'm gonna go right to the
Speaker:I like to say go to the phones
Speaker:cause that's what we used to say on the radio
Speaker:why did you go to the pipe
Speaker:no haha
Speaker:it's Nick from Boise Idaho
Speaker:also known as king of the porcelains throne and um
Speaker:can I say something sure
Speaker:why is it that no matter what
Speaker:when I go into the bathroom to sit down
Speaker:I'm gonna be in there for at least 20 minutes
Speaker:even when I'm done with my business
Speaker:I feel like the process is not fulfilled
Speaker:unless I sit there and relax
Speaker:so Doctor Erica
Speaker:Amy
Speaker:can you please explain this to me
Speaker:and also Jamie thanks for always saying
Speaker:what the rest of us are thinking
Speaker:you're welcome Nick from Boise
Speaker:I have so many thoughts right now
Speaker:because we've talked about it on
Speaker:the show that
Speaker:we don't talk about going to the bathroom very much
Speaker:and we have codes just this morning I said to you
Speaker:I gotta go make a phone call
Speaker:which is that I think it's a nice relationship buffer
Speaker:to not talk about bodily fluids
Speaker:we think it preserves intimacy
Speaker:and I went and I use the bath
Speaker:and now
Speaker:the only thing that sucks is if I have to make a phone
Speaker:a phone call I'll go to Erica go hey
Speaker:I need to make a really take a really important shit
Speaker:haha I'm just gonna say
Speaker:when you're having like stomach pain or you're like
Speaker:oh this one's gonna be a conference call yeah
Speaker:haha yeah
Speaker:there's nothing to say that he's coming in on this one
Speaker:it's gonna be long this is gonna be big
Speaker:we want everyone on this one
Speaker:when everybody on this call
Speaker:so I went upstairs to make a phone call and I
Speaker:this is always been a thing
Speaker:I don't know
Speaker:I this is I don't know what is Nick asking
Speaker:cause I feel like I went up there
Speaker:I came back down and you go
Speaker:I thought you were gonna make a phone call I go
Speaker:oh I'm done cause it took me about one minute
Speaker:I didn't realize you were gone
Speaker:I know I was like
Speaker:I don't even know what I was doing so yeah
Speaker:maybe yeah
Speaker:when I was rushing my second you go and you do it
Speaker:you clean up you know
Speaker:I've been in airport but I don't know
Speaker:this is what Nick is saying
Speaker:but I've been in airport bathrooms before
Speaker:one yesterday where I felt like a guy was like
Speaker:there was two guys having a wrestling match
Speaker:just like noises like ah
Speaker:come on get in there
Speaker:and I just like another guy on like
Speaker:you've got this keep going
Speaker:you're like coaxing something
Speaker:I feel like it's like a EWW
Speaker:in all seriously
Speaker:I feel like it's a struggle
Speaker:I feel like the bathroom is a struggle
Speaker:Nick saying something different
Speaker:sometimes people go to the bathroom
Speaker:why do you think
Speaker:sometimes people take a long time in the bathroom
Speaker:like the real reason or the medical reason
Speaker:there's two I think there's two reasons
Speaker:well the medical reason is tenesmus
Speaker:which is basically like
Speaker:you're straining to have a bow movement
Speaker:like it hurts yeah
Speaker:like painful defecation
Speaker:you're really straining to get it out or that sensation
Speaker:also it means of like you've completely defecated
Speaker:but you feel like you still have to take a poop
Speaker:oh so people are in the bathroom
Speaker:that's the worst why did you look at me like
Speaker:I know the absolute
Speaker:that's the absolute worst eww
Speaker:it's the worst possible thing
Speaker:well
Speaker:maybe you are someone to be next to you to coax it out
Speaker:I don't have that problem
Speaker:so
Speaker:actually
Speaker:we know that Americans have a horrible diet overall
Speaker:sure exercise regime
Speaker:we I read that in the study in the in the journal of
Speaker:Look Around no yeah
Speaker:I'm not fat shaming this is what drives me nuts no
Speaker:no I'm saying bad foods
Speaker:I'm not saying I'm not talking about these people wait
Speaker:I'm saying like yeah
Speaker:I went there no
Speaker:I'm just I feel like people don't talk about it
Speaker:cause they don't wanna hear it
Speaker:but like
Speaker:we have such an unhealthy preservative enriched diet
Speaker:so you're saying longer time no
Speaker:no I said preserve enriched
Speaker:like I feel like they pump it full of preservatives
Speaker:unnecessarily well
Speaker:so people have terrible GI health
Speaker:so
Speaker:a lot of patients struggle with like bowel movements
Speaker:are you saying that take a long time to poop
Speaker:because they have such an unhealthy
Speaker:low fiber diet
Speaker:exercise increases blood flow and oxygen everywhere
Speaker:helps with bowel stimulation
Speaker:helps with more regularity
Speaker:so if you're stagnant and you have poor diet
Speaker:you're gonna be in the bathroom for a long time
Speaker:but he said something different
Speaker:he did so you're saying I'm doing okay
Speaker:maybe my dad's pretty good because I'm in and out
Speaker:good sign yeah
Speaker:you should never have to strain
Speaker:you want your poo to come out and be curved
Speaker:like you want it to be like a C or s shape
Speaker:and you don't want it to like
Speaker:be floating and like greasy
Speaker:like a nice kerplunk is okay
Speaker:I got a double kerplunk today
Speaker:and I
Speaker:feel like my I would equated for using the phone call
Speaker:this is really gone farther than it has
Speaker:we should have we shouldn't have done this
Speaker:but I feel like my phone calls like hey
Speaker:just calling someone real quick
Speaker:what's a double kerplunk anyone
Speaker:I'm sorry I said that
Speaker:did you just coax out the second half
Speaker:it was it was one followed by another
Speaker:like when you see a bear in the wild and you're like
Speaker:oh it's a cub Ew oh my gosh
Speaker:I didn't even see that
Speaker:how did you just insulted a bear cub
Speaker:but I think my calls are like hey
Speaker:you got a second hang up
Speaker:some people they're on hold of American Airlines okay
Speaker:during the holiday season
Speaker:so that's why I said
Speaker:you want like the other answer or the medical one
Speaker:I think a lot of people me included
Speaker:if you want personal space
Speaker:you go to work and you're like
Speaker:I'm gonna go to the bathroom
Speaker:your boss isn't gonna be like listening in
Speaker:if you want to make a phone call
Speaker:or you wanna go on Instagram for five minutes
Speaker:you sit in there and you
Speaker:maybe you don't even have to pee
Speaker:but you go in there for a break
Speaker:I feel like guys notoriously do it way more than girls
Speaker:though like if they do poop they stay in there
Speaker:they don't flush the toilet
Speaker:they just sit in their filth like half hour goes by
Speaker:you're saying it's not medical
Speaker:it's shirking responsibility
Speaker:I think so it's trying to get personal time right
Speaker:so you have kids and they won't leave you alone
Speaker:so you say well
Speaker:I have to go poop hopefully they'll leave you alone
Speaker:they often won't you lock the door
Speaker:but it's a grab your phone
Speaker:you send a couple emails no one wants to be around that
Speaker:so they give some time but what I don't understand is
Speaker:the guys who do poop and then stay there and smell it
Speaker:and they're fine with it playing on the phone
Speaker:what are you doing for 20 minutes
Speaker:you can't flush while you're smelling all of it
Speaker:like isn't that disgusting
Speaker:yeah but you know why you can't flush it
Speaker:is it everyone out and out here knows you're done
Speaker:they go where's dad sit going out here
Speaker:bear cub filth yeah
Speaker:but I think you're right
Speaker:I think it's the craziness of the world
Speaker:and it gives you a
Speaker:it gives you a breather at a time when no one's gonna
Speaker:like barge in the bathroom
Speaker:where's if you're doing anything else
Speaker:somebody might commit to a nick
Speaker:I think you need some personal time
Speaker:is what the answer is I think you're feeling that
Speaker:that is a moment where you're getting that breather
Speaker:yeah and you're taking that time to yourself
Speaker:and I don't think there's anything wrong with it
Speaker:oh I've definitely lied and said I had to
Speaker:go take a huge dump you know
Speaker:one of the best things to get out of work
Speaker:like if you're like
Speaker:I just I don't wanna be here today yeah
Speaker:if you're like oh
Speaker:I feel like I'm gonna throw up they'll be like oh
Speaker:you eat something bad are you pregnant
Speaker:haha go back to work
Speaker:I Learned
Speaker:the more gruesome you are with your description
Speaker:the quicker your bosses to leave you alone
Speaker:they don't anymore so I just I'm like
Speaker:you know what I just blew ass oh jeez
Speaker:dripping everywhere
Speaker:I gotta go home Erica and then they're like
Speaker:oh oh go because it's so embarrassing
Speaker:no one would actually admit that to lie about
Speaker:now I have a question yes
Speaker:you got the day off yes you got the day off
Speaker:but now people throw up and they see you okay
Speaker:low price to pay so next question
Speaker:hey Jamie and Doctor Erica
Speaker:this is Tommy I'm calling from Greenville
Speaker:South Carolina and I have a question
Speaker:it's related to the Olympics
Speaker:you know how they just last week
Speaker:they listed their intimacy ban on athletes
Speaker:during the Olympics first of all
Speaker:how would they even enforce that
Speaker:I don't know how to do that
Speaker:but my question actually is
Speaker:involved with their performance
Speaker:so if athletes are having sex
Speaker:is that gonna impact their performance
Speaker:when it comes time to compete in their athletic events
Speaker:I've I've heard arguments on both sides
Speaker:and I was just wondering if that's a myth or not
Speaker:love to know your opinion thanks
Speaker:okay I love this question
Speaker:yeah no
Speaker:for reals like because yep
Speaker:athletic performance
Speaker:tied to sexual activity is such a hot topic
Speaker:like truly cause you'll have people split on both ways
Speaker:but in general the doctor answer
Speaker:oh what
Speaker:did you wanna say something
Speaker:no I'm very curious because we'll go ahead
Speaker:you go ahead and you tell me what you think
Speaker:and then I'll tell you the answer
Speaker:please don't lose your train of thought
Speaker:I got promise I got all the bear cubs lined up
Speaker:well
Speaker:I was just thinking when you're a boxer or a fighter
Speaker:even when I was doing my amateurish
Speaker:little wrestling kind of stuff
Speaker:for jiu jitsu no sex day out
Speaker:they say you need that energy
Speaker:was that my choice or because no one wanted us
Speaker:no I mean
Speaker:it's like you're not
Speaker:even if you have a girlfriend or something
Speaker:you know oh
Speaker:you mean with me son of a bitch
Speaker:miss that
Speaker:miss that one but the day of
Speaker:you said I think day of yeah
Speaker:you even know I don't get personal
Speaker:I have a stand up comedy role
Speaker:yes you have a very strict rule
Speaker:I do four hours before getting on stage
Speaker:no shenanigans hmm yeah
Speaker:it's weird sharing that rule with someone else
Speaker:that used to be just a rule ahead of myself
Speaker:yeah give your hands a break
Speaker:so what is the why do that
Speaker:it's a real thing I feel like it affects um
Speaker:we talked about this yes
Speaker:but what is your don't lose your thought
Speaker:please tell me I'm not losing my thought
Speaker:but we've talked about this before
Speaker:in general
Speaker:it's interesting that men after sex usually get tired
Speaker:yeah women after sex
Speaker:a lot of them surveyed actually have more energy yeah
Speaker:they don't wanna go straight to bed
Speaker:they're wide awake so with athletes
Speaker:I think the so the bit
Speaker:the best thing is
Speaker:cardiovascular activity with sex is fantastic
Speaker:it gets your heart racing
Speaker:your blood flowing your oxygen
Speaker:so in essence
Speaker:you're doing another activity for a star performer
Speaker:they're just getting their heart rate up again
Speaker:it's like they're doing a quick workout
Speaker:but what if I have a coach
Speaker:we push back a little bit
Speaker:I'm in the Olympics I'm not just going to some track me
Speaker:I'm in the Olympics I have a coach
Speaker:this is my whole life all of our exercises
Speaker:we go to the we got the CO2 max
Speaker:we got the you run at this man for this to warm up
Speaker:whatever
Speaker:you can't look at sex we don't know
Speaker:there's so many parameters for sex
Speaker:how long is it what if the girl's really big
Speaker:and you're having sex for a long time
Speaker:but what if what if
Speaker:hold on you are
Speaker:you're not attracted to her
Speaker:just maybe last longer I have no idea and um
Speaker:I'm just saying it's like an
Speaker:it's it's an
Speaker:it's an unscientific exercise
Speaker:that might cause you to possibly overtrain
Speaker:before your event
Speaker:that's not part of unless you're telling the trainer
Speaker:I might have sex for 20 minutes
Speaker:I feel like it's a non exact
Speaker:I feel like you don't think you're wrong
Speaker:because you're having
Speaker:Olympic City has nothing but elite athletes
Speaker:so everyone's gonna be in incredible overall
Speaker:peak physical shape
Speaker:but you don't think they have these regimens
Speaker:beautiful bodies
Speaker:well of course they're beautiful
Speaker:so you just had a bigger girl
Speaker:I couldn't spectator
Speaker:no what about athletes having sex with other athletes
Speaker:you're just hooking up with a random spectator okay
Speaker:okay so in the hotels where they all share it
Speaker:athletes having sex with their athletes
Speaker:I'm still saying there's too many variables okay
Speaker:we got these guys hooked up with on you know
Speaker:maybe they're on a treadmill they got note hooked up
Speaker:this is a very random
Speaker:what if we go too hard and we're tired for our event
Speaker:cause it wasn't well I agreed
Speaker:no sexual activity
Speaker:at least a few hours prior to an event
Speaker:would probably be the most favorable thing to do
Speaker:because you will be exhausted
Speaker:you will have expended a lot of energy
Speaker:it's caloric expenditure
Speaker:so you're going to be fatigued
Speaker:you can get muscle cramps you can get dehydration
Speaker:you're gonna have to hydrate and then prepare for the
Speaker:event so
Speaker:I would absolutely say
Speaker:you should avoid it right before
Speaker:or at least a few hours before
Speaker:but here's the other thing yeah
Speaker:what happens
Speaker:when you tell people they can't do something
Speaker:they um
Speaker:rotate them normally wait
Speaker:you're so but they're telling them they can
Speaker:so you're saying now that
Speaker:what if you just say you can't have sex
Speaker:to all of these athletes yeah
Speaker:what are they gonna wanna do
Speaker:Erica
Speaker:no means no when someone tells me I can't have sex
Speaker:I do what they want well
Speaker:they're telling them they can have sex now they are
Speaker:but there was a ban right
Speaker:so my point was when the ban was in place
Speaker:this is why I honestly think it was probably lifted 1
Speaker:it's ridiculous rule
Speaker:you're an adult if you wanna have sex have sex
Speaker:but what do you think is going on in their minds right
Speaker:they're training mentally
Speaker:just as much as they are physically
Speaker:so if you see someone and you're like
Speaker:I wanna hook up with them
Speaker:and they look at you and they're like
Speaker:I wanna hook up with you too
Speaker:but we can't
Speaker:are you focused on swimming 100 meters or are you like
Speaker:man I just wanna have sex with this person
Speaker:it's a great point
Speaker:so you could be distracted either way
Speaker:it's gonna we're gonna run into some issues
Speaker:I think the biggest thing is
Speaker:if you have a whole regiment of like
Speaker:what you eat and how you mentally
Speaker:like meditate and prepare for your athletic event
Speaker:and how much sleep you have to get the night before and
Speaker:you know all of the stuff that you would do yeah
Speaker:add sex to that regimen and up until that point
Speaker:do whatever you want
Speaker:I totally agree with you I'm just saying
Speaker:I don't know how if he had a girlfriend or something
Speaker:I could see we schedule it but I'm just wondering
Speaker:random hookup how do we calculate
Speaker:maybe they should only be allowed to do it
Speaker:after their event or like 2 days before
Speaker:can we take some all you just after
Speaker:because then again you're mentally
Speaker:if you're super distracted on the other person
Speaker:you might get mind fucked
Speaker:because you couldn't actually do
Speaker:you know
Speaker:8 years ago they wouldn't even let you mind fuck
Speaker:that was also lifted everything you're saying is true
Speaker:but you know who would vehemently agree
Speaker:disagree with you
Speaker:everything you're saying is 100% true but in the moment
Speaker:you know who might disagree
Speaker:my dick like your dick has a mind of its own
Speaker:and it doesn't listen and it's like
Speaker:we don't care
Speaker:we'll be fine but if you are a regimented athlete
Speaker:you're going to know a couple hours before your event
Speaker:you are not gonna mess up
Speaker:four years of training for a quick hook up
Speaker:I don't know if you're told you absolutely can't
Speaker:and the person walks in and you're like
Speaker:it's now or never then you will
Speaker:but if you're allowed to do whatever you want
Speaker:before or after you're an adult
Speaker:what um what Olympic
Speaker:I you I know your
Speaker:your boyfriend knows nothing about the Olympics
Speaker:like for instance I don't even know
Speaker:so is it the Summer Olympics coming up
Speaker:when the summer is coming up yes
Speaker:so that usually coincides with it
Speaker:who do you think is it gonna be
Speaker:is it Paris yeah
Speaker:yeah did you also hear
Speaker:they're not gonna have air conditioning
Speaker:yes I did see that yeah
Speaker:but that's just France being France
Speaker:when I lived there they had no air conditioning
Speaker:and you just had to deal with it
Speaker:and it was in the summer and it was over 100 degrees
Speaker:huh yeah
Speaker:I lived in a an attic space that I rented out
Speaker:and it was extremely hot
Speaker:the windows on the ceiling so you got no airflow
Speaker:I'm sure they'll take care of the athletes
Speaker:to make sure that they don't overheat
Speaker:yeah
Speaker:it says they designed the buildings in their defense
Speaker:they say they designed the building
Speaker:so they'd be comfortable places to live in the summer
Speaker:even without air conditioning yeah
Speaker:of course you have maximal airflow
Speaker:you don't want to have heat stroke victims
Speaker:for your prize athletes yeah
Speaker:you know what I think is very interesting
Speaker:I watched a documentary
Speaker:and I can't remember what it was on
Speaker:but it was so it was about the Olympics
Speaker:like years and years and years only likes not just one
Speaker:yeah but they had this part where they talked about how
Speaker:cities like how corrupt it is to um
Speaker:do the lottery to get the Olympics right
Speaker:oh hell yeah right
Speaker:but like so many people want it
Speaker:but there was one year where nobody wanted it
Speaker:because it was so expensive
Speaker:to build all this infrastructure yeah
Speaker:and some of these third world countries that are like
Speaker:championing for it
Speaker:Wanna get all these sponsors to come in
Speaker:and they make all of this money from like tourism sure
Speaker:then they're like wait a minute
Speaker:we're gonna have these huge
Speaker:like soccer stadiums or whatever
Speaker:next to an impoverished town where people are starving
Speaker:we have all these people come in
Speaker:pump it full of money
Speaker:but then they leave
Speaker:and we have all of these decrepited bandit buildings
Speaker:so I actually like what Paris did
Speaker:what they do well
Speaker:because this is a reusable living space
Speaker:after the games are over they can actually recycle that
Speaker:and rent it out to anyone in the city
Speaker:I got a question for you
Speaker:I don't know what they're doing
Speaker:as far as all of the event spaces though
Speaker:if they're building things up
Speaker:but I just think it's interesting how um
Speaker:financially motivated of course
Speaker:motivated like the Super Bowl
Speaker:like everything right
Speaker:but I mean like a city that wants a Super Bowl same
Speaker:same kind of thing you get all the commerce and no
Speaker:but that's different
Speaker:I said I hate it because I feel like they
Speaker:oh okay
Speaker:I guess I don't know anything about that but like
Speaker:did they where is the Super Bowl
Speaker:I think they do the same thing
Speaker:it's all over petition for it yeah
Speaker:oh cause you
Speaker:but it's already a stadium that's built right
Speaker:they don't build one just for the Super Bowl right
Speaker:right like that would be wasteful
Speaker:well then I don't hate the Super Bowl
Speaker:I thought you were saying that
Speaker:they built stuff just for it oh no
Speaker:just the city buys for the right to have it
Speaker:so they can have all the people come in
Speaker:and the I don't know
Speaker:think about what do you what do you watch and um
Speaker:what is the big summer
Speaker:is that like running gymnastics women's gymnastics
Speaker:duh have the most sex the legal ones right
Speaker:hottest athlete as is this volleyball I said gymnastics
Speaker:yeah aren't those attractive women
Speaker:why would they be playing volleyball if I just oh
Speaker:I jumped it
Speaker:I jumped from I was thinking hottest athletes
Speaker:you gotta go volleyball
Speaker:have you ever seen a volleyball tournament
Speaker:I was watching for an hour once I got
Speaker:there's a ball in a net
Speaker:I don't even realize what's going on
Speaker:did you know some of the players on
Speaker:in a certain country refuse to wear a bikini bottom
Speaker:and wore shorts like really
Speaker:I'd love to see their vagina
Speaker:oh no they would do what Jamie
Speaker:I would think
Speaker:they should all take off their bikini bottoms
Speaker:I fall for this I've not heard of this in full support
Speaker:they shouldn't have to wear bikini bottoms
Speaker:that's crazy
Speaker:I agree with that why don't they make the Marathon
Speaker:male Marathon runners wear a jockstrap
Speaker:most attractive male summer of an athlete
Speaker:in your opinion
Speaker:what do you think
Speaker:I give you some of the events uh we got
Speaker:I don't think gymnasts are the most attractive
Speaker:I think they're too muscley
Speaker:like they're amazing and they're wonderful
Speaker:and I could never do anything
Speaker:but you're saying like the most attractive body
Speaker:archery
Speaker:I was reading something with like shot put badminton
Speaker:did you know badminton is a well okay
Speaker:so this here's the other thing
Speaker:there's
Speaker:there's events that I'm just like really like soccer
Speaker:I love soccer more than any other sport
Speaker:that's the one I played I'm obsessed with it
Speaker:World Cup is my thing yeah
Speaker:but then it's like Olympics also
Speaker:why can't we just opt out and be like
Speaker:let's just do the World Cup
Speaker:why do we also have to do soccer in the Olympics
Speaker:yeah I don't dare take my um
Speaker:or like do they do football or or yeah
Speaker:yeah they do football
Speaker:that's also flag football
Speaker:that's hilarious that's strange right
Speaker:and there's um shootings
Speaker:I know Super Bowl doesn't include other countries yeah
Speaker:that's true so that's fine
Speaker:but most countries don't play football
Speaker:I don't know
Speaker:I just feel like sometimes it's duplicitous
Speaker:okay but back to your question uh
Speaker:the hottest male athlete golfer
Speaker:boxer no
Speaker:beach volleyball yeah
Speaker:yeah agree
Speaker:you know why
Speaker:because they expect them to also be shirtless
Speaker:and pretty much naked yeah
Speaker:yeah they know that they're gonna be on TV
Speaker:looking like beach volleyball is
Speaker:they have to be has very little to do with the sport
Speaker:I know and I'd like them to have clothes on
Speaker:I don't watch Olympics to like get my rocks off
Speaker:did I tell you the thing
Speaker:I have a ton of respect for them
Speaker:like swimmers wearing their tiny little things
Speaker:yes makes sense no
Speaker:I was his swimmers hot or not hot Michael Phelps
Speaker:hot guy they're all in great shape right
Speaker:not a fan okay
Speaker:no I'm just saying
Speaker:that makes sense to have limited clothing
Speaker:because they don't want the resistance in the water
Speaker:oh for speed yeah
Speaker:but I don't understand that in most other sports same
Speaker:what's the least attractive
Speaker:um summer sport table tennis
Speaker:imagine those guys wearing
Speaker:bikini bottoms
Speaker:table tennis you know what the most mistake
Speaker:if you had to bang someone on the Olympics
Speaker:you know what the most risky would be
Speaker:fencing you know why
Speaker:if you don't know what they look like
Speaker:love is blind cause yeah
Speaker:if you like love is blind oh God
Speaker:I had no idea that guy's a good fencer
Speaker:but I like track and field
Speaker:not for I'm not I'm saying like watching it
Speaker:I like watching track and field
Speaker:I think it's fascinating but women's gymnastics
Speaker:I grew up on that I love that weightlifting
Speaker:you ever get into the weightlifting
Speaker:I enjoy the weightlifting
Speaker:sometimes
Speaker:little wrestling every time
Speaker:I badminton thing that happened with um
Speaker:my son he is
Speaker:he's a freshman playing on the varsity basketball team
Speaker:I was very proud as his dad
Speaker:that's great and it's the team at the school right
Speaker:like it's a his actual school that he goes to
Speaker:it's a school team it's not like a extracurricular side
Speaker:one of those comp teams
Speaker:this is like a the schools basketball team
Speaker:and it's weird there's like
Speaker:some sort of disconnect between the communication with
Speaker:like the gym teacher and the basketball team
Speaker:there's almost like a competitiveness sometimes
Speaker:he's like hey
Speaker:you missed this math test and he's like yeah
Speaker:it was the school drove me to a game
Speaker:of course I missed math class
Speaker:it was like a little bit of a communication disconnect
Speaker:and he went into
Speaker:we had a made of a parent teacher conference
Speaker:oh I'm sure you were nice
Speaker:I have trouble in these I have a lot of trouble
Speaker:and the guy said he said the charm
Speaker:I shouldn't say my son's name right
Speaker:he said my son because I just feel like
Speaker:he's not taking badminton a serious
Speaker:as he feels like he should
Speaker:okay and I'm trying to be this guy's like probably
Speaker:you know this is a tough job he does
Speaker:he's gym teacher props to him
Speaker:so I'm giving him like ever
Speaker:and then he goes and I'm like yeah
Speaker:but I go my son's like practicing hours and hours a day
Speaker:like what is he being disrespectful
Speaker:and he goes no no
Speaker:he doesn't seem like he's focused
Speaker:and I'm like okay
Speaker:I'll talk to him and he goes
Speaker:listen man do you want
Speaker:you want your son to be at a like a family gathering
Speaker:say it's 4th of July and they go
Speaker:we're getting a badminton game together and he's
Speaker:he can't play he's out there
Speaker:he doesn't know what he's doing
Speaker:yeah and I go um
Speaker:not for nothing I go
Speaker:but I think that the reason we choose badminton
Speaker:at the 4th of July
Speaker:at the party is because everyone can play
Speaker:and there's no specialized training required to play
Speaker:Batman that's why the little thing floats down
Speaker:not like tennis where it can go whizzing by
Speaker:it's the little birdie it like flows down and I go
Speaker:my aunt is as good as me at Batman
Speaker:that's the kind of sport this is
Speaker:I think we're gonna be okay
Speaker:I'm sure that went over well
Speaker:yeah and then he um haha
Speaker:I forgot what happened after that
Speaker:but everything's fine but I just
Speaker:I just thought it was I just thought it was
Speaker:which it's funny when rules
Speaker:I want this guy he should be respected
Speaker:he should be but I feel like if you go
Speaker:oh man
Speaker:this kid's practicing like so much
Speaker:wow if he even gives it a little bit of effort
Speaker:I know he played two hours last night
Speaker:like that's pretty cool who's an attitude problem
Speaker:I would be I have a lot of trouble
Speaker:I do trouble like watching a
Speaker:I would have trouble like
Speaker:if you think about when you're a kid and there's like
Speaker:a teacher issue with like
Speaker:you and the teacher
Speaker:and when you went home to your parents
Speaker:and you talked to them
Speaker:I felt like my parents were always on the teacher side
Speaker:they were always in the school side
Speaker:you shouldn't have done that
Speaker:I find myself
Speaker:especially with like I know I have good kids
Speaker:I find myself on their side
Speaker:like I go man
Speaker:I feel like have you ever done the like okay yes
Speaker:I'm really sorry
Speaker:and then you walk in the car and you high five your kid
Speaker:and you're like yeah
Speaker:they were wrong that's kind of what I did
Speaker:it's kind of the as good as it gets move
Speaker:where DiCaprio pretends to be the
Speaker:he impersonates the substitute teacher
Speaker:and his dad's like I can't believe he would do that
Speaker:and on the way out he's like
Speaker:he's psyched for him that's the wrong movie yeah
Speaker:Catch Me If you can
Speaker:excuse the cats like I'm terrible at um
Speaker:terrible movie stuff
Speaker:great answers though I think um
Speaker:I don't know the Olympics thing
Speaker:I like your answer
Speaker:I think there's no way to really tell
Speaker:I predict because of what you said about men and women
Speaker:that this year's Summer Olympics
Speaker:all the men are gonna be very sleepy
Speaker:I think some of the Marathon runners might take a nap
Speaker:at some point laying on the beach from all the sex
Speaker:women lots of energy right
Speaker:and I feel like the country that gets a gold medal
Speaker:is gonna be the country with the most losers
Speaker:you know why they're home
Speaker:they're not having sex they're just focused on winning
Speaker:well then maybe it was a strategic move by France
Speaker:so the France could
Speaker:maybe France like quietly told all their players
Speaker:like the banners lifted for everyone
Speaker:but you
Speaker:these um is it crazy that you could be
Speaker:you ready for one
Speaker:isn't it crazy that we could be at a bar
Speaker:and you go like oh
Speaker:what do you do for work and I go
Speaker:you know what
Speaker:I'm right now I'm an Olympic athlete you like shit
Speaker:that's amazing and you're like
Speaker:what kind and I go
Speaker:ping pong squash
Speaker:what's the worst summer Olympic sport
Speaker:well I least amount of talent
Speaker:I have respect for everybody
Speaker:but the one that sailing is one sailing that's hard
Speaker:it's hard but how do you watch that
Speaker:they just say those don't sell away
Speaker:you know where they go
Speaker:what one do you think is like so easy
Speaker:like it shouldn't be like a worldwide competition
Speaker:I would say badminton
Speaker:I would say badminton cause you know what
Speaker:do you know that when I
Speaker:it's just like a bit I swear to God it's true
Speaker:what when I was so good at table tennis when I was
Speaker:in high school
Speaker:that I tried to find a college that had table tennis
Speaker:is it possible I want to be on the table tennis team
Speaker:and then I lost all ability
Speaker:I tried to play again recently and it's gone
Speaker:it's just like it does it just goes away
Speaker:well anyway
Speaker:I'm looking forward to the canoe sprint this year
Speaker:that's not one and is that really one
Speaker:yeah yeah
Speaker:there's a sport called baseball softball
Speaker:make up your mind motherfuckers which is it
Speaker:basketball is gonna be fun this year
Speaker:that's one that I don't like
Speaker:what can we do tournaments with
Speaker:let's do a World Cup before basketball
Speaker:I wanna see all the stars playing together
Speaker:it's really fun
Speaker:you know get all the stars in the teams together
Speaker:like the all star team I know
Speaker:but I'm saying let's do like a World Cup for it
Speaker:like wouldn't be fun like in a couple of months
Speaker:we have the World Cup of basketball
Speaker:and then a few months
Speaker:later World Cup of soccer and then a few months later
Speaker:the World Cup of
Speaker:I don't know I'm be honest
Speaker:I don't know I'm being very quiet
Speaker:cause I don't understand what's happening
Speaker:you mean that would be like someone from the world
Speaker:I don't understand why tennis
Speaker:we have Wimbledon we have all of these
Speaker:like what's the Olympics then if
Speaker:why do we have to have that as well
Speaker:it's a bunch of World Cups right
Speaker:what's the difference so why can't we just do one
Speaker:why can't we have soccer just in the World Cup
Speaker:and not also in the Olympics
Speaker:what do you gotta do twice
Speaker:I don't I imagine it has something to do with money
Speaker:at the end of the day I don't know
Speaker:coming up on the next episode of afraid to ask
Speaker:I had one time I told you
Speaker:and I think you told me this happened to you once
Speaker:I had gotten in very good shape
Speaker:I was just like but really doing a lot of weightlifting
Speaker:like not as much peloton
Speaker:I was just trying to get like jacked for a while
Speaker:I don't know why
Speaker:and I went in there in that thing for the ladies
Speaker:for the ladies more for myself
Speaker:honestly and some of the other guys at the gym
Speaker:for the dudes for the dudes
Speaker:for the dudes and I went in there
Speaker:and they told me I was obese cause of my BMI
Speaker:oh yeah
Speaker:body mass index
Speaker:I did that once to somebody I felt so stupid
Speaker:you did you know I did I I wanna swear I was so mad
Speaker:it made me so mad cause I was working so hard
Speaker:that the lady comes in and she goes
Speaker:doctors gonna put you in a weight loss program I go
Speaker:what are you talking about
Speaker:I go I I'm honest
Speaker:but I've never been in better shape
Speaker:like I wasn't ripped her but I was like 89% body fat
Speaker:yeah and he came in he was like buddy
Speaker:we can all stand those compounds and I I flex my
Speaker:you rip your shirt I did I go ahead
Speaker:I go look at my hands yeah
Speaker:I go look at my hands and he goes
Speaker:he goes he goes
Speaker:I'm sorry I'm the one that need to lose weight
Speaker:that's what he said I've said that to people too
