Fetish
In this episode...
In this episode of "Afraid to Ask,” Jamie and his more mature half Dr. Erika discuss the phases of love, role playing, make up sex and how to know when your relationship is in trouble.
Chapters
00:00 - Comedians Are Never On Call
02:45 - Courting
03:00 - Jamie's Limited Skills
03:41 - Worst On-Call Phone Calls
05:00 - Drugs That Look Like Candy
07:10 - Weed Safety Issue
08:00 - Phases Of Love
09:00 - Dumbest Call To A Doctor
12:50 - Question From A Listener: Fetishes
14:00 - How To Know Your Relationship Is In Trouble
16:43 - Role Playing More Successful People
18:20 - Fetish Disorder
21:20 - Jamie's Pedicure
23:00 - S&M
36:50 - Sweeping
39:00 - No Guy Romance Novels
40:25 - Make Up Sex
About the Podcast
Comedian Jamie Lissow and his smarter half Dr. Erika answer all kinds of medical, dating, sex, divorce, questions some might be afraid to ask. Listen & subscribe for prescriptions and punchlines.
Mentioned in this episode:
Warning:
This is an uncensored podcast that will include adult language and topics. Viewer discretion is advised.
Transcript
check 1 2 well
Speaker:hello there boyfriend how are you this fine day
Speaker:I'm really good is it working
Speaker:yes excellent
Speaker:let's not touch shit I'm afraid to ask
Speaker:but I have a great question
Speaker:I don't even know what I was gonna say
Speaker:I'm so disturbed right now
Speaker:disclaimer
Speaker:this is afraid to ask episode
Speaker:I don't know who knows
Speaker:Erica is a doctor obviously
Speaker:Doctor Erica I find parts of your job fascinating
Speaker:and just a disclaimer to the audience
Speaker:we usually turn our phones off and we start recording
Speaker:we can't do that today
Speaker:you may hear a beep or a ring or a tone come in
Speaker:because you are on call
Speaker:and when you're a doctor sometimes you're on call and
Speaker:your job is it's like no one ever calls me at 2 a
Speaker:m and they're like quick tell me a dick joke
Speaker:I'm gonna call now
Speaker:but you get you put that thought in
Speaker:but you get you know what's funny
Speaker:you actually called me once
Speaker:we didn't even know each other that well and you said
Speaker:this is an emergency
Speaker:I need you to make me laugh do you remember that
Speaker:yeah and I felt kind of guilty
Speaker:because I've never done it since
Speaker:but
Speaker:that was the closest I've ever gone to being on call
Speaker:you're having a really tough patience
Speaker:for being kind of mean and they're being mean to you
Speaker:and your students at work
Speaker:and you said and I didn't I kind of deliver
Speaker:you caught me in a really good time
Speaker:sometimes I'm not funny at all
Speaker:sometimes I'm feeling pretty good
Speaker:you caught me to good
Speaker:I just you were actually really funny because yeah
Speaker:I had two students with me
Speaker:and a couple patients had screamed at all of us
Speaker:and one was being incredibly uh
Speaker:racially insensitive and discriminatory
Speaker:and I as their really you know
Speaker:instructor and a person of authority
Speaker:had to take matters into my own hands
Speaker:and call this person out which I would have done anyway
Speaker:I don't tolerate that bullshit
Speaker:I don't think I knew that but yeah
Speaker:and I didn't I apologize then for sending you guys
Speaker:all those racist jokes
Speaker:whatever so yeah I was like hey
Speaker:I'm dating a comedian and I
Speaker:don't know how to lift the mood
Speaker:like I was really struggling this time
Speaker:usually I can hold my own
Speaker:so yeah I called you and I was like
Speaker:fucking send something by the way
Speaker:you did deliver and we delivered like go ahead what
Speaker:we weren't dating at all
Speaker:way pre talking
Speaker:when you ask this this is still in the courting phases
Speaker:they say we never courted
Speaker:I like to categorize things by like
Speaker:was it before after I saw your nipples
Speaker:I would say Pree
Speaker:this Pree we weren't dating
Speaker:I saw the edge of one in a photo
Speaker:but I think it was a mistake
Speaker:but I was glad I was able to that made me feel good wow
Speaker:okay cool
Speaker:I wasn't give you a compliment until
Speaker:you were really funny
Speaker:well
Speaker:because you didn't come up with like one joke or two
Speaker:you came up with a couple
Speaker:and then you send me another video and you're like
Speaker:in case like
Speaker:someone's a real big asshole later on today
Speaker:I'm gonna give you a backup to use for later
Speaker:and that actually made us laugh
Speaker:more than anything else
Speaker:you know why that was important for me
Speaker:it was important because I knew you
Speaker:your pool of people you date
Speaker:I was assuming
Speaker:was gonna be surgeons and doctors and things like that
Speaker:when you called upon me to do
Speaker:the one thing that I think I can do
Speaker:it would be like if you called me and you were like hey
Speaker:do you know how to juggle
Speaker:I'd be like holy fuck
Speaker:yes I did
Speaker:like it's one of those things
Speaker:I don't have a ton of skills
Speaker:and I actually could come through
Speaker:don't worry I won't call you for that one
Speaker:so you're on call do you have any calls last night
Speaker:no not when we were sleeping
Speaker:I only got one during the day
Speaker:it's been a really light call this weekend
Speaker:which is nice really nice
Speaker:I promise I'll move on
Speaker:weirdest call you've ever had when you're on call
Speaker:dumbest waste of your to
Speaker:this person should not have called
Speaker:and then we'll move on yeah
Speaker:okay well
Speaker:the good thing is I have a nurse who triages a lot
Speaker:so it doesn't happen anymore triage yeah
Speaker:so like if something's going on and they're paid for it
Speaker:I was at a party at college once
Speaker:me and these two girls almost turned into a triage
Speaker:like we're triage that's why you said it like that
Speaker:does triage mean
Speaker:we're organizing people in different rooms
Speaker:based on priority or correct
Speaker:but obviously on call it's more so
Speaker:you're proud of that one good job
Speaker:when you're on call it's more so like
Speaker:does this require a doctor to be involved
Speaker:or is this something that a nurse could handle
Speaker:yep so then the nurses will call and say hey
Speaker:this person needs this prescription called in
Speaker:they don't have the authority
Speaker:so I have to
Speaker:or this person has abnormal labs or these symptoms
Speaker:I don't know but if someone calls and says hey
Speaker:I'm you know
Speaker:my face is drooping and I'm my
Speaker:or my mom's face is drooping and she has third speech
Speaker:she can't forearm that's a clear sign of a stroke
Speaker:they immediately say go straight to the hospital
Speaker:call an ambulance or I'll call one for you
Speaker:so you don't need to like have a doctor for that
Speaker:or a simple thing my
Speaker:kid uh
Speaker:drink too much sugar today
Speaker:hmm and they'll be like
Speaker:that's not really an important or relevant call
Speaker:so just let me thought tomorrow
Speaker:and don't bother a doctor at 1 in the morning right
Speaker:I didn't used to have that
Speaker:so you just made me think
Speaker:I'm putting this on for future episode
Speaker:but once what
Speaker:one of my children almost ate a 10 milligram weed
Speaker:gummy bear oh
Speaker:it was crazy you know
Speaker:kids like don't eat
Speaker:there's a lot of stuff circulating about drugs
Speaker:and how they're disguised to look like candy now
Speaker:like horribly this look like candy yeah
Speaker:so like a lot of kids will go to the er
Speaker:overdose on something
Speaker:because their parents or whoever left it out
Speaker:and the kids genuinely thought it was candy
Speaker:I mean they're marketed as candy right
Speaker:a lot of them intentionally try to brand it
Speaker:to mimic certain candies that we liked when we
Speaker:were kids absolutely
Speaker:and before I sound like a horrible parent
Speaker:I wasn't supposed to have the kids that weekend
Speaker:I was not my weekend with the kids
Speaker:so I kind of had like
Speaker:things were loosey goosey around the house
Speaker:you know we got weed and study right
Speaker:cause I don't I didn't childproof it
Speaker:cause they weren't living with me full time
Speaker:and they came over cause they forgot something
Speaker:yeah and I just taken it out cause I was about to
Speaker:it was a gummy bear
Speaker:a gummy bear is so marketed towards children and but
Speaker:but he picked it up and went
Speaker:and I slapped it out of his hand
Speaker:yeah well
Speaker:it's dangerous
Speaker:we should do a follow up episode on what would happen
Speaker:if that happened call poison control
Speaker:well I guess the first thing you do with any ingestion
Speaker:all right let me erase that for my topics for no
Speaker:but that's really easy that's all you do
Speaker:you call posing control
Speaker:and they walk you through what to do
Speaker:and then you either get advice on what you can give
Speaker:to administer to the trial
Speaker:to keep them safe
Speaker:or what symptoms to look for that would warrant going
Speaker:do you have snacks do you have a hacky sack
Speaker:I feel like if it was 10 mg or less
Speaker:the kid would be okay
Speaker:I'm not keep in mind I'm not a doctor
Speaker:let's just guess
Speaker:I guess I don't know what all poison control
Speaker:honestly I would say zero
Speaker:I don't know what amount would warrant
Speaker:I'd recommend zero
Speaker:I think a lot of it too is symptomatic observation
Speaker:but you also have to think
Speaker:if a child gets into a thing of vitamins
Speaker:and ingest all of them iron toxicity is lethal
Speaker:so yikes even though you think oh
Speaker:it's just a Flintstone multivitamin
Speaker:it can be very damaging so it's also the quantity
Speaker:that's why I don't I keep no vitamins in the house
Speaker:it's just weed it's a safety issue
Speaker:but it's poison control
Speaker:9 1 1 or can you get sent over to them
Speaker:when you call them look their number up online
Speaker:9 1 1 it's different
Speaker:but if you call 9 1 1 sometimes they can
Speaker:I'm sure put you in touch with someone
Speaker:but there's a direct line for portion control
Speaker:Doctor Eric is on call if you hear a noise
Speaker:that's what it is I am pause the podcast
Speaker:you ever get super uh oh yeah
Speaker:the weirdest one I ever got
Speaker:you asked me that huh
Speaker:just now you said that and we got distracted on weed
Speaker:uh yeah
Speaker:the weirdest call can I apologize right now
Speaker:for sipping and slurping into the microphone
Speaker:what the fuck is matter with me
Speaker:I heard it in my in my ears
Speaker:I go what is that a tsunami outside
Speaker:and it was me slurping and I apologize
Speaker:you wouldn't have said that if I
Speaker:hadn't said that you were slurping your tea last night
Speaker:would you
Speaker:I think I let you run it self conscious of it
Speaker:we're gonna say that again
Speaker:we did talk last night about how
Speaker:we could talk about smaller time
Speaker:but how when you first are with somebody
Speaker:like nothing annoys you
Speaker:and then then little things start to creep in
Speaker:and you were like I didn't notice last night
Speaker:you slurp your tea really loudly
Speaker:and maybe I wouldn't have noticed that before
Speaker:maybe a little bit sad not because I'm self conscious
Speaker:but because what a wonderful phase to be in well
Speaker:I also think it's very interesting
Speaker:how is it a choice or is it subconscious
Speaker:like the slurping yeah
Speaker:like it's always been there
Speaker:so I heard it but did I choose not to hear it
Speaker:because I was like madly in love
Speaker:with this euphoric sensation of first dating
Speaker:or did I genuinely not hear it
Speaker:because my body didn't allow me to
Speaker:because I had so much dopamine surgery
Speaker:that I just wanted to date you
Speaker:I don't know I think it's interesting
Speaker:it did not in any way bother me
Speaker:it's not in my head
Speaker:but I would like to let you know that from now on
Speaker:I will be totally unrelated
Speaker:be drink fuck
Speaker:beat me to them oh
Speaker:someday I'm gonna fucking pee surgery
Speaker:so sometimes I get calls that really matter like hey
Speaker:this person has these questions
Speaker:and I genuinely feel like I've helped them a lot
Speaker:and it's kind of rewarding right
Speaker:sure when it's a real actual
Speaker:that's I think the best part of my job is like
Speaker:if I'm tired or having a bad day
Speaker:I do know I made a difference in someone's life
Speaker:and I think
Speaker:it's kind of cool to have that responsibility
Speaker:the dumbest call I ever got
Speaker:was somebody who called me from their apartment
Speaker:and said that their air conditioning unit was broken
Speaker:and they asked me to fix it
Speaker:and I was wrong number no
Speaker:and I said that you say this is the physician
Speaker:I call thinking yeah
Speaker:and it was a weekend
Speaker:they say my air conditioner doesn't work
Speaker:yeah so how this works is when you call
Speaker:you call your doctor's office
Speaker:and the doctor's office is closed
Speaker:and there's a message that says the doctor is closed
Speaker:if it's an emergency go to the hospital
Speaker:or if you need to talk to the on call doctor
Speaker:about a medical problem press 1
Speaker:then you get routed to me and I answer
Speaker:so this person they press that button
Speaker:I do have a medical problem
Speaker:so they heard that it was the doctor's office
Speaker:well they dialed the doctor's office
Speaker:then they heard the recording that said
Speaker:it was a doctor's office
Speaker:and then if it was a medical problem
Speaker:took talk to the doctor
Speaker:so then they got me and I was like
Speaker:you know 2
Speaker:3 in the morning and I'm like okay
Speaker:what's going on my air conditioning unit is broken
Speaker:and I was like what
Speaker:and they were like yes
Speaker:I need you to fix it and I go
Speaker:just reiterate this is the physician on call
Speaker:uh what's your medical emergency
Speaker:well I'm hot
Speaker:and I said yeah
Speaker:that's problematic oh
Speaker:what a and I said
Speaker:what do you want me to do
Speaker:that's a dumb and I was like
Speaker:are you okay like
Speaker:are you diaphragic are you having heat stroke
Speaker:it wasn't like the middle of summer
Speaker:they were just uncomfortable
Speaker:and so I said well
Speaker:I don't know shit about air conditioning units
Speaker:and um
Speaker:they weren't even apologetic
Speaker:they were just like well fine
Speaker:I guess I'll call somebody else
Speaker:this is so crazy dude
Speaker:you just woke me up at 3 a
Speaker:m I'm not compensated for call
Speaker:by the way it's a requirement for my job
Speaker:it's built into so if I get zero calls or I get 500
Speaker:I make no money
Speaker:there's no motivation other than continuity
Speaker:no incentive yeah
Speaker:it's just a part of well
Speaker:to take care of patients is the incentive
Speaker:but a lot of facilities will just say hey
Speaker:if there's a medical problem
Speaker:please go to the urgent care or emergency department
Speaker:to cut out this kind of thing
Speaker:so
Speaker:it's frustrating when these kind of calls wake you up
Speaker:and you can't go back to sleep
Speaker:because somebody's fucking
Speaker:air conditioning wasn't working
Speaker:that person's a moron though
Speaker:that person doesn't I mean
Speaker:they're having a heart stroke or something
Speaker:he's kind of an asshole this person was an asshole yeah
Speaker:like I mean
Speaker:I've had people call
Speaker:just scared about their kids or whatever
Speaker:and that's the cause that matter
Speaker:so like I called
Speaker:won't bother me
Speaker:to get woken up in the middle of the night
Speaker:if it's for a valid reason
Speaker:that's my job I'm happy to do it
Speaker:but that's yeah
Speaker:fix your own I remember that you got upset once
Speaker:you got woken up all night for sex
Speaker:I did it and you were like
Speaker:that is not a priority
Speaker:and you should have called someone else
Speaker:that didn't happen
Speaker:it didn't happen that's crazy
Speaker:that's it when I hear a story like that
Speaker:I go that's like a dumb person
Speaker:that is a super dumb person yeah
Speaker:often times we'll share stories of the dumbest call
Speaker:we've ever gotten I like those stories
Speaker:I like that
Speaker:I got some questions coming in from listeners oh
Speaker:you got all excited there
Speaker:I thought I would all let it out
Speaker:the shoulder thing I did which probably is
Speaker:that and slurping
Speaker:are now on your list of things that annoy me
Speaker:I'll give you a choice
Speaker:so I'm gonna give you what was that nothing
Speaker:it wasn't gonna be nice you go ahead
Speaker:it rarely is haha
Speaker:so I'm gonna give you
Speaker:three options of ways we could go here okay
Speaker:with a question come in we got a guy it's uh
Speaker:it says penis break which may we could take one
Speaker:I still
Speaker:it says this person thinks his penis might have broken
Speaker:and then we have someone who says oh
Speaker:this person is dating somebody
Speaker:and they see a pattern in the person's exes
Speaker:they wonder if it's a problem
Speaker:and then we have a question about fetishes
Speaker:which way would you like to go
Speaker:hmm fetish okay
Speaker:I might regret this haha
Speaker:what you got only a broken penis
Speaker:we'll get to that I've been dating my girlfriend
Speaker:break a penis okay
Speaker:well that one's settled it's not a bone okay
Speaker:you can talk about it later though you said well
Speaker:you can injure it but break like fracture like a bone
Speaker:you can't do that way first
Speaker:what we're doing that way first no
Speaker:it's just you
Speaker:you just said that you're really interested in that
Speaker:and in case you listen
Speaker:I rolled my eyes is because medically it's a misnomer
Speaker:you can't fracture something that doesn't have a bone
Speaker:there's no bone in your dick
Speaker:all right well
Speaker:we'll revisit that a little bit if we need to
Speaker:this person says but we do call it a peanut
Speaker:now I'm gonna confuse you now what
Speaker:well fractures yeah that is a bone
Speaker:we need to fix that just when you talk about it
Speaker:there's a fucking bone now gross
Speaker:I'm talking about snapping penis and you're just like
Speaker:oh I have a heart on that's a problem
Speaker:we'll get back to it
Speaker:but I thought I felt something like that nope
Speaker:so it says I've been dating my girlfriend
Speaker:for a little over a year
Speaker:I just found out she has a fetish
Speaker:that I think is strange hmm
Speaker:I'm really sorry
Speaker:but I have to I'm gonna have to edit that out
Speaker:let me just say this again
Speaker:here's the question
Speaker:my boyfriend can only get off if I wear different wigs
Speaker:every time we have sex
Speaker:that sounds like a strange fetish
Speaker:should I be worried
Speaker:my boyfriend can only get off if I wear different wigs
Speaker:you know what I think would be super problematic
Speaker:if it was like a judges wig
Speaker:like a like a one of those blond or like um
Speaker:I would think like the George Washington wig
Speaker:that's what I was trying to get at like in England
Speaker:what they still wear that would be awful compliment
Speaker:what this person's probably getting at this this woman
Speaker:he doesn't want it to be her wow
Speaker:just straight at it
Speaker:so you're thinking she's putting on these wigs
Speaker:this is not like a multicolored clown wig
Speaker:we're talking about different women
Speaker:he wants to and it wasn't just one wig
Speaker:it's all he has a thing for redheads
Speaker:and she doesn't want to dye her hair red
Speaker:for example right
Speaker:it said what different one every time
Speaker:so that's a different chick
Speaker:so this person wants to hook up with someone new
Speaker:all the time so
Speaker:they can't get off
Speaker:unless they feel like they're banging multiple people
Speaker:when you just feel like a used vessel
Speaker:so yeah I think that's a huge problem
Speaker:that's a lack of intimacy
Speaker:yeah
Speaker:you don't think there's a world where he's at least
Speaker:like trying to include her in this fantasies
Speaker:not maybe he's not cheating on her
Speaker:he could have been he's trying to
Speaker:you think it's hurt maybe
Speaker:what if this guy no
Speaker:why are you trying to justify
Speaker:I'm just trying to find a boyfriend
Speaker:stay together if I'd love to fuck you
Speaker:but every time we do
Speaker:I need you to have a different face
Speaker:wow not expression
Speaker:whole face I feel like wig a lot less
Speaker:like I feel like she felt not as bad as I just felt
Speaker:when you said face
Speaker:cause your face is like that's what it is
Speaker:well but a wig for a guy don't feel like
Speaker:changes a lot of how he looks yeah
Speaker:like I can change the way I look
Speaker:just with how I style my hair right
Speaker:so a woman like color is not the only thing style
Speaker:shape everything
Speaker:there's a ton of stuff so like
Speaker:he's getting off by thinking
Speaker:it's a bunch of different people
Speaker:if I was just like oh
Speaker:today I want you to have blond
Speaker:hair today I want you to have gray hair
Speaker:I I feel like you could argue it's still messed up
Speaker:no matter what but I
Speaker:I don't know I'm reading into it
Speaker:no I hear
Speaker:I hear exactly
Speaker:cause it doesn't change the way I look at you really
Speaker:right
Speaker:to remember the tell me the one time you wanted me
Speaker:you know
Speaker:sometimes we'll put on outfits and remember you're like
Speaker:oh this is a
Speaker:you made me dress
Speaker:like someone that had a better job than me haha
Speaker:and you let's see that
Speaker:and you were like oh
Speaker:tell me again about your tell me how low your copay is
Speaker:well tell me about your health insurance
Speaker:you know what that's the same thing
Speaker:that's the fantasy you know
Speaker:where people like dress up as like a schoolgirl
Speaker:or the guys the business suit or it's like um
Speaker:I don't like schoolgirl
Speaker:that's the fantasy for me is being with you
Speaker:so like why would I wanna
Speaker:yeah that's why there's a problem like okay
Speaker:yes there's certain things in our sex life that I enjoy
Speaker:that I've had explained to you and you do really well
Speaker:now that's not like typical
Speaker:thank you very much like fantasy things right
Speaker:but it's not to make you
Speaker:a different way to install that swing
Speaker:no you're right
Speaker:in all seriousness I remember once my ex wife um
Speaker:she was like I'm just like a schoolgirl
Speaker:and then when she came in oh great
Speaker:what she looked like
Speaker:she had like gotten a job about it
Speaker:and then decided to go back to school
Speaker:she was a lot older and
Speaker:the students I remember I was like
Speaker:problem with the age thing
Speaker:I was like oh
Speaker:is it you just can't pass that one exam
Speaker:she like the guy that went just too much um
Speaker:well I also think that's problematic
Speaker:if we're going back in school girl
Speaker:cause then
Speaker:you wanna have sex with someone who's underage
Speaker:that's what I was just saying all of it is problematic
Speaker:that's I was just saying I think fetish is
Speaker:so there's good fetishes and bad fetishes right
Speaker:if you have a fetish disorder
Speaker:subjective or saying or you're saying no
Speaker:generally so if you have a fetish
Speaker:what's the definition of a fetish
Speaker:usually it's either having sex with an inanimate object
Speaker:which is the only way that you can orgasm
Speaker:or achieve sexual peak or climax
Speaker:or at least some type of sexual satisfaction
Speaker:would you
Speaker:would you consider a vibrator an inanimate object or no
Speaker:cause it does it moves that's an excellent question
Speaker:thank you consider
Speaker:I think
Speaker:if you are only able to have an orgasm with a vibrator
Speaker:and not with an actual person
Speaker:that does fit the description of a disorder
Speaker:the other way that we'll look at it medically is
Speaker:if you can only achieve the same sexual satisfaction
Speaker:with a true body part on your partner
Speaker:but it's non sexual so for example foot fetishes
Speaker:you're obsessed with toes and heels and all of that
Speaker:but a vagina or a penis doesn't allure to you
Speaker:completely
Speaker:so if you like a foot and you like touch a foot
Speaker:and then you have sex and use sexual organs
Speaker:it's typically not viewed as problematic
Speaker:unless your partner doesn't share um
Speaker:the enjoyment or or it's disturbing to them
Speaker:but it's always problematic
Speaker:if it becomes something
Speaker:where you cannot achieve any sexual peaks
Speaker:unless you use this object
Speaker:seems very problematic
Speaker:and going back to the question about the wigs
Speaker:you're right that the problem with that fetish
Speaker:say you feet was your fetish
Speaker:that's very different than saying
Speaker:I want you to look like a different person every time
Speaker:well so you also bring up a really good point
Speaker:we find that typically well
Speaker:so medically when I'm counseling patients
Speaker:there's three major reasons that we have seen
Speaker:people have certain fetishes
Speaker:one is what I'm just reading
Speaker:a list of the most popular kinks and fetishes
Speaker:oh gross okay
Speaker:so one is childhood experiences okay Learned behavior
Speaker:uh so you know
Speaker:you're exposed to certain things
Speaker:or you weren't exposed to certain things right
Speaker:um 1 is biological factors of course
Speaker:what your specific body has turned on
Speaker:sometimes we can't explain it
Speaker:but people are drawn to certain things
Speaker:um and then third is cultural
Speaker:and I think that one's really interesting
Speaker:different countries if you pull up your list
Speaker:are you saying one man's
Speaker:one country's kink is another country's totally normal
Speaker:it could be yeah
Speaker:I don't like the feet one I don't like the feet either
Speaker:that just seems to be the most common one
Speaker:that people bring up and that's why I mentioned it
Speaker:interesting that like across the board
Speaker:like feet comes up first
Speaker:but if you honestly look at different cultures
Speaker:in the way that they approach sexuality
Speaker:different fetishes
Speaker:rain higher ranked among them than other countries
Speaker:sure I guess so what's your list
Speaker:is it American based or is it like some
Speaker:this is kinky worldwide world wide wide ever tell you
Speaker:um it also feed I feel like they could be super gross
Speaker:that's why I imagine someone with a foot fetish
Speaker:it's a clean foot every time I went to have a
Speaker:if I said this on this podcast right
Speaker:I really apologize but I got a
Speaker:what's it called when you almost said a pedophile
Speaker:what's it called when you get your feet
Speaker:oh boy
Speaker:what is it called a pedicure I was thinking of a
Speaker:of a nail nail file whatever in my feet
Speaker:I hadn't gone maybe ever to this place
Speaker:to any place to get a to get a pedicure
Speaker:if you call them pedophiles
Speaker:that's not what that's I thought that's what they used
Speaker:and in my feet were so bad
Speaker:I felt I got them the lady did them
Speaker:she sing a lot of stuff in a different language
Speaker:that seemed like
Speaker:it didn't seem complimentary towards me
Speaker:and the end of it I tipped her 20 dollars
Speaker:which I thought was like a good tip
Speaker:it was a 20 dollar uh
Speaker:service and she looked at me like
Speaker:yep that's about right regular pedicure
Speaker:that's your first mistake
Speaker:it is yeah more expensive they should be
Speaker:but I think she was so grossed out
Speaker:she felt like 100% tip was appropriate so oh
Speaker:sadism am I saying that right
Speaker:oh wait so this is an order of the most prevalent
Speaker:apparently the most popular kinks and fetishes
Speaker:most popular okay
Speaker:10 worldwide favorites sadism is number one
Speaker:it's where you inflict
Speaker:physical or psychological suffering
Speaker:another person to stimulate sexual excitement
Speaker:or when I was married
Speaker:I got all that without the sexual excitement part
Speaker:just got inflicted
Speaker:sad okay
Speaker:so that is that um
Speaker:no masochism is a different one
Speaker:yeah SNM
Speaker:well talk about
Speaker:read the definition of sadism versus masoism
Speaker:so it always gets paired s in them
Speaker:but they are very different oh
Speaker:as with them very much related to sadism
Speaker:masochism is in fact combines the acronym S&M masochism
Speaker:when you drive sexual gratification from your own pain
Speaker:yes humiliation or frustration
Speaker:yeah oh okay
Speaker:I think it's interesting too is um
Speaker:is the sadist someone that enjoys inflicting pain
Speaker:like they get sexual satisfaction
Speaker:or is the sadist someone who enjoys inflicting pain
Speaker:because their partner gets sexual satisfaction
Speaker:because they're the masochist
Speaker:so you have to look out at both ways
Speaker:I don't have a problem with that one
Speaker:obviously she's okay because of our sex wow
Speaker:that okay okay
Speaker:next but my point is
Speaker:remember the time you told me was enough humiliation
Speaker:just for being with me well
Speaker:the humiliation part is weird to me yeah
Speaker:that's
Speaker:don't you worry about be like a trauma
Speaker:and don't you worry about
Speaker:the sex happens and then you're done
Speaker:and you're like okay
Speaker:like like
Speaker:I feel like it's just
Speaker:something carries into your regular life or something
Speaker:turn on the television and talk about the next thing
Speaker:you guys want to watch after you just like did
Speaker:I don't know what you would do
Speaker:that's embarrassing to them
Speaker:to truly embarrass someone else
Speaker:like did you give a list what about pee on them gross
Speaker:I'm just I just embarrassing
Speaker:that's that's degrading yeah
Speaker:it's not a good way to wake up
Speaker:degrading fine line between degrading and humiliating
Speaker:I think
Speaker:so degrading would be like orgasming on a woman's face
Speaker:okay humiliation humiliated
Speaker:I almost think of humiliation is public shaming
Speaker:public shaming well
Speaker:I mean are you humiliated with orgasm on a woman's face
Speaker:in an arena
Speaker:you're right holy fuck
Speaker:what about frustration I mean
Speaker:I guess you could embarrass someone when I won
Speaker:but I think of it as more like public yeah
Speaker:embarrassment humiliation frustration
Speaker:I don't like the frustration
Speaker:is that like teasing for a long
Speaker:long time before you do something too long
Speaker:I like it
Speaker:you did that one time I remember
Speaker:so SNM is fine
Speaker:I think the biggest thing you and I could agree on is
Speaker:the safe word yes
Speaker:the safe word right
Speaker:yeah by the way
Speaker:can I go back to degrading really quick
Speaker:what don't you think degradation to me
Speaker:it has a lot to do with
Speaker:do you know there's porn on the internet
Speaker:I've heard about this never have I
Speaker:but people talk there's porn where it's called
Speaker:the woman doesn't want the thing done to her
Speaker:I am not joking right now
Speaker:so I feel like degrading
Speaker:if it's a bit of a role play where like
Speaker:before it starts a girl goes
Speaker:I want you to do this to me yeah
Speaker:that feels so different to me than like
Speaker:why did you do that or like
Speaker:like doing this to a person that didn't want it
Speaker:uh huh but
Speaker:don't know I brought that up
Speaker:what did you just say when I whisper yeah
Speaker:oh I just when you said that you don't see the porn
Speaker:I was like yeah
Speaker:I doubt it oh
Speaker:I've seen some of it but I would not forced
Speaker:it just doesn't seem nice to be good dear rush porn
Speaker:I you just said this to me
Speaker:did just two days ago this morning
Speaker:not this morning oh
Speaker:I told you this morning yeah
Speaker:yeah I don't frequently do it
Speaker:let me ask you a question and it's kind of
Speaker:it honestly is usually off putting
Speaker:so I typically avoid it but occasionally I feel like it
Speaker:okay like once a year
Speaker:no more no okay
Speaker:well happy anniversary
Speaker:thank you we should go out celebrating
Speaker:what did you type into the search bar
Speaker:what are you really looking for
Speaker:porn the other night uh
Speaker:girl on girl girl wow okay
Speaker:well that's it for today
Speaker:haha girl on girl
Speaker:are you serious
Speaker:I'm totally fine with this and I'm proud of it
Speaker:I believe you there's no threat to you
Speaker:I am absolutely heterosexual
Speaker:but the reason that I like I
Speaker:I find if I ever was like paired with another female
Speaker:I couldn't do anything sexually to her
Speaker:I I don't find those organs to be appealing to me
Speaker:I like your goods but you like to watch it
Speaker:I like to watch it
Speaker:because I like to watch it being done to someone
Speaker:fantasizing that that person is me yeah
Speaker:where like
Speaker:I can see all the parts that I would want touched
Speaker:would you and other girls do that to you
Speaker:no I really
Speaker:so why not guy and girl
Speaker:is it because you have a boyfriend
Speaker:cause the guy always ends up sticking his dick in her
Speaker:and that's not really that pleasureful
Speaker:spoiler alert
Speaker:well because I like it when it's all about the woman
Speaker:yeah when you're
Speaker:when you have a porn where is a guy and a girl
Speaker:sometimes he'll like eat her out or whatever
Speaker:but then you like obviously he wants his
Speaker:whereas the woman if they flip it
Speaker:it's the same view I just see another vagina
Speaker:I was so it turns me on seeing a woman get off
Speaker:thinking it's me getting off
Speaker:it turns me off seeing a penis and balls
Speaker:because the only one I want to see is yours
Speaker:I have no desire to see that
Speaker:do you know um
Speaker:I never it makes total sense and I like
Speaker:I like hearing that and I will never typical though
Speaker:I don't know I'd be curious
Speaker:I can never watch a porn
Speaker:never watch a porn when you're hungry by the way
Speaker:eww no
Speaker:I'm just saying cause I came like
Speaker:don't go grocery shopping when you're hungry
Speaker:cause you buy too much shit
Speaker:you went ever yeah
Speaker:like I came
Speaker:I came when the pizza guy knocked on the door
Speaker:so hungry cheese
Speaker:wow give me that thing
Speaker:what kind of porn do women prefer
Speaker:you know
Speaker:you could learn a lot from a person if you if you uh
Speaker:if you looked at their autofill
Speaker:what's it called you know
Speaker:you type something and it fills in and automatically
Speaker:this isn't doing any of that
Speaker:so yeah
Speaker:pornhub oh far and December 19 2,019
Speaker:this is from Pornhub
Speaker:which is where I went cause obviously everyone does um
Speaker:far and away that's when this girl on girl was
Speaker:this is when you watch the porn
Speaker:is that what you're saying
Speaker:no okay
Speaker:Pornhub is where I went cause it's free uh huh
Speaker:it's a great way to wow I'm so normal
Speaker:I'm normal okay
Speaker:so Pornhub said into in 2,019 far and away
Speaker:the most viewed category of women is lesbian
Speaker:followed by popular with women and Japanese
Speaker:I don't understand what popular by women means
Speaker:that doesn't really help you um
Speaker:and then it said I wanted to find the guys oh wow
Speaker:woo
Speaker:okay I feel like you don't even need me
Speaker:and so lesbian popular with women again
Speaker:I don't like that cause that doesn't
Speaker:that's that could be anything Japanese
Speaker:what do you mean wait
Speaker:wait
Speaker:slow down the second category says popular with women
Speaker:I think what does that mean
Speaker:I think they're saying that from the people
Speaker:from the women that responded to our survey
Speaker:they have said that lesbian is more is more number one
Speaker:that's what they prefer
Speaker:so they're saying popular with women
Speaker:meaning like not men are not being taken into account
Speaker:with the searching of lesbians
Speaker:that's what I would think this is so interesting
Speaker:so after Japanese threesome Ebony amateur anal mature
Speaker:don't even know what that next one means
Speaker:now I'm getting pop UPS of stuff I don't wanna see wow
Speaker:what's Hentai h E N t a I
Speaker:no idea MILF animals
Speaker:which is interesting Big Dick Gangbang wow
Speaker:okay and here's the guys
Speaker:one sounds like my setlist from the other night
Speaker:at the comedy club
Speaker:Hentai yeah
Speaker:is this style of Japanese for
Speaker:oh cartoons
Speaker:EWW who is not jacked off to the Simpsons
Speaker:no I don't understand this at all okay
Speaker:the men's favorite this is porn
Speaker:I found a picture of a drawing
Speaker:and it got me a little bit
Speaker:something happened with my penis
Speaker:well cause it's a good drawing
Speaker:Hentai is up higher on men's list than women's
Speaker:guess what
Speaker:the No. 1 most viewed category by gender for men was
Speaker:according to Pornhub in 2,019
Speaker:blow job Japanese by far
Speaker:look at the graph look how much
Speaker:more than anything else wow
Speaker:and then the second one was amateur
Speaker:I've never searched Japanese
Speaker:it would never occur to me
Speaker:what does that mean mature
Speaker:older is that what you're asking
Speaker:I don't know and then no
Speaker:yeah mature means like 50+ oh
Speaker:so wow that's surprising me yeah
Speaker:so Japanese amateur mature
Speaker:MILF hentai
Speaker:Ebony anal lesbian
Speaker:that's interesting big tits threesome
Speaker:big dick
Speaker:transgender no
Speaker:so you know what though we didn't talk about like
Speaker:if this was cisgender or transgender or yeah
Speaker:I mean it didn't say um
Speaker:any sexual preferences it just said gender probably
Speaker:I'm presuming assigned at birth
Speaker:so that doesn't really help us okay
Speaker:so that was interesting but guess what
Speaker:I found this other one yeah
Speaker:Huffington Post I don't know if you wanna do that
Speaker:I prefer I I I think they have good information
Speaker:just a circle back the stereotype
Speaker:this girl should break up with the guy
Speaker:that wants the different wigs
Speaker:or just have a conversation and tell him to fuck off
Speaker:and if you honors that then stay with him
Speaker:but if he still wants a different wig
Speaker:what if she goes hey no problem
Speaker:bring a different dick oh right
Speaker:we'll come back great response
Speaker:zing yeah
Speaker:bring your pubic hair different color
Speaker:bring your friend's dick and have a red fro above it
Speaker:look at this science is backing it up may of 2023
Speaker:this is blowing my mind
Speaker:at first I was a little bit not worried
Speaker:I don't care you know
Speaker:it's weird when I search for porn
Speaker:I write I write blowing my mind
Speaker:go ahead
Speaker:I don't know where it went
Speaker:how's blowjob not in there
Speaker:I don't know
Speaker:I searched for that my whole research showed
Speaker:this is according to Huffington Post
Speaker:in the UK 2,023 90% of women
Speaker:prefer to visualize or create scenarios in our heads
Speaker:to get us turned on
Speaker:further backing fact
Speaker:that most women often search for woman on woman porn
Speaker:so they can see the anatomy yeah
Speaker:and it is
Speaker:despite the stereotype that men love lesbian porn
Speaker:it's actually women who search it much more
Speaker:that's wild
Speaker:that would be my close to my No. 1 thing I would watch
Speaker:do you find that surprising
Speaker:more accurate
Speaker:I don't know why that says
Speaker:do you do you mean accurate
Speaker:as far as how people interact in real life
Speaker:as opposed to a guy on woman
Speaker:that might be crazy or exaggerated
Speaker:do you find it uh
Speaker:surprising or not surprising at all that
Speaker:that's probably what I would search first
Speaker:you would search lesbian porn first
Speaker:I wouldn't write lesbian porn
Speaker:I think I would write like girl on girl why
Speaker:I don't know
Speaker:I have no interest
Speaker:no interest
Speaker:in seeing a man have sex with a woman with his penis
Speaker:none so you also just want to see girl parts
Speaker:well I don't mind a blowjob thing
Speaker:oddly enough a video
Speaker:really yeah
Speaker:well that's the same thing as me
Speaker:you like watching what you want to be done to you
Speaker:yes I find it very distracting
Speaker:when I see it from the guys angle
Speaker:it's porns with um
Speaker:opposite genders
Speaker:I feel like are always shot from the man's perspective
Speaker:yep it's never from the woman's perspective
Speaker:nice and it bugs the shit out of me
Speaker:yes me too
Speaker:because I'm like I don't wanna see the guy's ass
Speaker:and his balls slamming into her
Speaker:and his penis like that doesn't do it for me
Speaker:have you ever seen quite unattractive actually
Speaker:I hate that angle the ball slap
Speaker:why did it don't like it
Speaker:just because I can't do it also don't like to see it
Speaker:what I don't like well
Speaker:I do have you ever seen true POV
Speaker:true true porn
Speaker:POV is where it kind of looks like it's your penis
Speaker:so you're there I think these weren't like a GoPro
Speaker:it must look ridiculous to film
Speaker:I feel like that would know and then the girls doing it
Speaker:but you feel like it's your own
Speaker:it's almost like a VR situation
Speaker:like you're looking down at the penis oh
Speaker:well okay
Speaker:that's fine and when you said GoPro
Speaker:I was imagining like the magic school bus
Speaker:going inside of a vagina or something
Speaker:the magic school bus
Speaker:you know how like what's the magic school bus
Speaker:it was like some that's bad that I reference that
Speaker:cause it was a childhood cartoon oh
Speaker:but they would like
Speaker:shrink and go into a blood vessel and drive them all
Speaker:like through the body
Speaker:and then it show you like your stomach oh
Speaker:and they learn about stuff
Speaker:I was just thinking
Speaker:you're like the beginning of fight girls
Speaker:I view of like going into a vagina like seeing
Speaker:and I was like Ew
Speaker:that'd be terrible no
Speaker:it's like suppose I was
Speaker:you could see what a man sees
Speaker:when he's getting that done
Speaker:that's what a POV well that makes sense to me
Speaker:cause that's why I like watching girl on girl
Speaker:uh huh
Speaker:I I really do like to see what I think
Speaker:is gonna be happening to me
Speaker:that's what turns me on yeah
Speaker:that's the most respectful viewing of pornography
Speaker:I could ever imagine when you told me that
Speaker:it made me happy I was happy for you
Speaker:I did there was no feelings of if you said
Speaker:oh I watch this guy do this thing
Speaker:we've talked about it for
Speaker:but the only thing you do is
Speaker:sometimes you'll read a book where it describes oh
Speaker:detail I love my raunchy romance books
Speaker:I was just trying to get my sister to download
Speaker:yesterday just had a conversation
Speaker:and I was like trying to recall like what they say
Speaker:and she was like holy shit Mike yeah
Speaker:this isn't like oh
Speaker:and then he kissed me and we went to the bedroom
Speaker:this is like and then he fucking shoved inside of me
Speaker:and his veins were pulsating all up and down his dick
Speaker:and it's very vulgar and it's wonderful
Speaker:and I like to do it when I'm driving
Speaker:you called me once and I said
Speaker:I think that it's more dangerous than you
Speaker:having two drinks and driving
Speaker:you listening to this shit no
Speaker:you're swerving back and forth
Speaker:I did swerve but
Speaker:I didn't think about an imaginary penis
Speaker:in a man with tattoos that I don't have
Speaker:I well it wasn't that
Speaker:it was the setup of like
Speaker:the sex scenes were pretty impressive
Speaker:he uh
Speaker:I never liked romance novels and I always thought it
Speaker:was silly that these like
Speaker:older women would read them
Speaker:and fantasize about a man sweeping her off her feet
Speaker:and them going into the sun
Speaker:I used to fantasize about a woman sweeping
Speaker:like
Speaker:I'm gonna give you like 3 seconds to retract that one
Speaker:totally just a joke
Speaker:I apologize it that if we were in Godfeld
Speaker:they would say that's what a sexist would say
Speaker:we're not on Gutfeld
Speaker:we're in my house so sweeping my I apologize
Speaker:you know I'm just kidding you know I am
Speaker:I'm really sorry really sweeping
Speaker:I want going on in my house is sweeping the floor
Speaker:with your own fucking tears
Speaker:when I've cut you off sexually
Speaker:because of the shit you just said
Speaker:so if you wanna do that we can do that
Speaker:so you're saying you're in trouble now Jake
Speaker:you're saying
Speaker:sweeping up your feet
Speaker:really sorry I feel like you're really um
Speaker:you're saying you don't want to
Speaker:some super romantic thing
Speaker:you're suddenly realizing you don't mind like a
Speaker:I'm certainly glad that you went
Speaker:the polar opposite of a romance novel
Speaker:and went straight to a misogynistic dick yeah
Speaker:I have a whole book just lady like oh
Speaker:then I entered his dirty bedroom and put stuff away
Speaker:and then you're gonna keep going with this one saying
Speaker:it's a
Speaker:it's different you know
Speaker:what did I tell you in all of your comedy
Speaker:would upset me more than anything else
Speaker:when we first started dating
Speaker:like what topic was off limits
Speaker:I um
Speaker:that would really upset me if I said I was dumb
Speaker:no
Speaker:massage misogynistic stuff
Speaker:ding fucking ding oh okay
Speaker:well that was a silly joke
Speaker:I apologize okay
Speaker:next holy shit
Speaker:I'm mad at you I don't like that shit
Speaker:do you understand though seriously
Speaker:I don't find it funny and
Speaker:the reason I don't find it funny is
Speaker:a sensitive subject
Speaker:that a lot of men have used humor and
Speaker:to get away with very inappropriate
Speaker:disrespectful behavior that has gone on for centuries
Speaker:so the reason I don't like jokes
Speaker:is because you're just perpetuating that
Speaker:it's silly and it's not a big deal
Speaker:and it's a huge deal
Speaker:so I think it'd be safer to move on something else
Speaker:romance novels are great
Speaker:are there guy romance novels I don't know
Speaker:I don't think there are I don't think so
Speaker:you know why because guys can just get off real fast
Speaker:they don't need like the whole fantasy in the
Speaker:yes biological connection that women usually desire
Speaker:absolutely that's exactly what it is
Speaker:I think that's what it is
Speaker:like right now we you could have sex with me right
Speaker:like right now like if we cut
Speaker:would you be able to have sex with me and get off
Speaker:of course okay
Speaker:there's absolutely no way in hell
Speaker:I would get off right now
Speaker:cause I'm mad at you wow
Speaker:okay what um
Speaker:interesting even if you kind of wanted to nope
Speaker:interesting
Speaker:a woman's largest sex orging organ is her brain by far
Speaker:I met some women where it was the vagina
Speaker:we have numerous studies out there that prove that
Speaker:women need some type of connection
Speaker:and neurologically they have to have a feeling of trust
Speaker:or security to want to have sex
Speaker:one night stands women can do it absolutely
Speaker:there's always outliers
Speaker:but the average female require some type of love bond
Speaker:connection and when you upset them
Speaker:and they feel more betrayed or hurt or disrespected
Speaker:and then
Speaker:your shot of having sex completely goes out the window
Speaker:and men also enjoy makeup sex
Speaker:because they feel like that's how they bond
Speaker:whereas women when you're in a fight
Speaker:the last thing they wanna do is have sex
Speaker:because they don't feel closer
Speaker:so when you ask for makeup sex
Speaker:the man in his brain genuinely is thinking hey
Speaker:this will help us feel closer
Speaker:I wanna do it I wanna make up
Speaker:I wanna feel bonded to my partner
Speaker:the woman is like fuck you asshole
Speaker:I need you to show that you love me in a different way
Speaker:and once we're made up then I will have sex with you
Speaker:because they feel very disrespected
Speaker:having sex when you're arguing
Speaker:can I seriously could I seriously defend myself no
Speaker:I think is a comedian if I went on stage
Speaker:there's actually a guy right now getting a lot of
Speaker:shit for doing um
Speaker:like a physical uh uh
Speaker:a joke about like violence towards women
Speaker:and I think he deserve at least getting shit
Speaker:because it's on a Netflix special
Speaker:and I think he probably shouldn't have said it
Speaker:and it's not great
Speaker:I would like to defend sometimes my brain
Speaker:I heard the word sweep the reason I made that joke was
Speaker:because it is such a stereotype
Speaker:so I feel like sometimes I get a little bit of a pass
Speaker:cause I'm like you know
Speaker:I don't
Speaker:sometimes I think she knows I'm not really like that
Speaker:and so I could do this joke
Speaker:and then my brain makes a thing
Speaker:and then I go uh
Speaker:but I see what you're saying
Speaker:you made a great point that it's a
Speaker:happened for hundreds of thousands of years
Speaker:and um
Speaker:I I understand
Speaker:I apologize well
Speaker:I said centuries I wasn't talking to eons
Speaker:I think early cavemen
Speaker:um they weren't the most general risk
Speaker:probably equivalent in what they did
Speaker:yeah um
Speaker:I am glad that he's getting a hard time
Speaker:yeah that joke
Speaker:by the way
Speaker:don't know if you've heard it
Speaker:it's been told 100 times it's sort of like a hack joke
Speaker:talking about the mat rife thing
Speaker:or the beginning of his nothing special
Speaker:he I think he's just trying to like
Speaker:go outside of his normal mold of appealing tip
Speaker:young women who's like unrehearsed comedy
Speaker:but he um
Speaker:does the drug deal with special and it's like a
Speaker:it's like a super like kind of like an old joke
Speaker:it's almost like a street joke
Speaker:which kind of funny
Speaker:that he's getting a lot of shit for it
Speaker:but he'll be fine
Speaker:I think that goes back to say
Speaker:that something was tolerated for a long time
Speaker:and it needs to be changed in our culture now
Speaker:I think it's also like oh
Speaker:it's been said so much it's funny isn't true
Speaker:if you think about like
Speaker:racist comments or homophobic comments
Speaker:we used to say them all the time
Speaker:but now if we say them it's completely not acceptable
Speaker:right you're right that he also made that mistake
Speaker:because you've heard the joke
Speaker:you've heard the joke
Speaker:but times have changed and things are not like
Speaker:you can't say that this joke is
Speaker:I would say conservatively 40 years old
Speaker:and he's the other day I think the problem also though
Speaker:is the segregation of women's rights
Speaker:compared to other activism is
Speaker:you know women
Speaker:typically make up more than 50% of a certain culture
Speaker:population yet they're disparaged more and silenced
Speaker:and a lot of other groups
Speaker:if you look at them
Speaker:have had a lot of activism and been outspoken
Speaker:and I do not want to speak
Speaker:I think that there's so much progress
Speaker:we have to make across the board
Speaker:but it really frustrates me that women um
Speaker:still universally get disrespected a lot
Speaker:so that's why I'm sticking to my
Speaker:my hands on you make you make great points
Speaker:and so we did not get um
Speaker:in this episode we did not get to as often happens
Speaker:we did not get to I think my penis is broken
Speaker:and we also did not get to
Speaker:there's been
Speaker:there's a common thing with this person's exes
Speaker:and this person feels threatened
Speaker:because he or she doesn't fit the mold
Speaker:I can't remember if it was a girl or guy
Speaker:I got a quick question
Speaker:I think we cover this a tiny bit before we move on
Speaker:before we go we might have said a little bit
Speaker:something about this in the previous podcast
Speaker:but I don't remember you walk in
Speaker:I am watching pornography
Speaker:besides the crazy ones like schoolgirl
Speaker:inappropriate hypothetical situation
Speaker:I was trying to think of it happening
Speaker:I don't think that's ever happened
Speaker:but you walk in I'm watching pornography and I go oh
Speaker:you caught me I'm watching I show it to you
Speaker:it's girl and girl you're not that upset
Speaker:we covered what do I show you
Speaker:and we're getting rid of any kind of horrible abuse
Speaker:or step whatever
Speaker:the f person
Speaker:what what do you get a little bit upset about
Speaker:yeah you're really trying to like rough me up today huh
Speaker:I am what do I not like you watching on porn
Speaker:if age stuff would piss me off
Speaker:but no I mean
Speaker:not that that's what I'm saying specifically
Speaker:like not craziness about underage or nothing
Speaker:like illegal or criminal I'm saying like as a woman
Speaker:you see something that a guy might think like
Speaker:oh you're pissed at me for this
Speaker:like what would it be what would it
Speaker:what about like a guy with seven girls or something
Speaker:like a gangbang or like um
Speaker:of course I wouldn't like that yeah
Speaker:I don't I wouldn't like anything past like basic porn
Speaker:you know what's funny though is um
Speaker:I'm glad we talked about it
Speaker:because if I saw you watching two guys having sex
Speaker:I'd have a lot of questions
Speaker:but I just
Speaker:I've got some good news for you and that's what I said
Speaker:right I watched two girls having sex
Speaker:it's okay Jamie I'm not cheating on you
Speaker:I just want to like picture myself getting eaten out
Speaker:and I'm like but if you do it
Speaker:I do really wanna be with a woman
Speaker:I've got questions I'm not okay
Speaker:I feel like what a wild it's not a
Speaker:and this is where I think it's fair to say
Speaker:it's a double standard and I have to admit that
Speaker:as strong as I feel about women's empowerment
Speaker:and female Equality and equity
Speaker:we also have to talk about the opposite
Speaker:this is not fair it's not fair
Speaker:so I'd have to be patient and say okay
Speaker:why are you watching dude on dude porn
Speaker:is it because you liked watching him get a blowjob
Speaker:if it was in the ass I'd be like
Speaker:well
Speaker:is that because that's what you wanna do
Speaker:or is it because you want a guy
Speaker:I don't know that I would really have a problem
Speaker:you're right I would say it's
Speaker:I think you're I think you'd have to be a homosexual
Speaker:if you watch that from what I know
Speaker:so yeah but I don't think it's fair to just assume it
Speaker:since I just so openly said I watched her on girl yeah
Speaker:okay with it I think I have open communication
Speaker:I once was on a porn site
Speaker:and like something like that flashed on
Speaker:I was like oh my God
Speaker:like right
Speaker:cause it sometimes you don't know what's coming up yeah
Speaker:and it was a guy with a gun on soap
Speaker:but I I just do
Speaker:I needed to know how it ended
Speaker:and so I watched a little bit
Speaker:and we all know how it ended yeah
Speaker:you know
Speaker:I wouldn't like that stuff that you just looked up
Speaker:anime and stuff that's really fucking creepy
Speaker:would that be okay you come in the room for me
Speaker:it's creepy what about you walk in person
Speaker:why are you getting off to cartoon
Speaker:it is weird it really bothers me
Speaker:like do you need this fake
Speaker:perfect body that you can like customize on AI
Speaker:like you walk in I'm either watching guy on guy
Speaker:and you wanna be with me forever
Speaker:haha or and or or I'm watching anime
Speaker:what do you
Speaker:what do you wish is the obstacle you have to overcome
Speaker:guy and guy or anime
Speaker:I would take guy and guy over anime no
Speaker:no
Speaker:you wouldn't walk in if you see me anime like
Speaker:do you really want to fuck a cartoon
Speaker:I would have a hard time
Speaker:because when you go to a comic book shop
Speaker:you just blow your little
Speaker:probably people do because for me
Speaker:I I always wanna understand
Speaker:the perspective of the other person
Speaker:if you're watching guy on guy
Speaker:I honestly would think okay
Speaker:he's probably homosexual and then I would think well
Speaker:maybe he's doing exactly what I like to do
Speaker:when I watch porn and see it from that perspective
Speaker:why don't I talk to him if you're watching a cartoon
Speaker:it's because you want something fake
Speaker:and I can't ever produce that procure that
Speaker:replicate it
Speaker:there's nothing that's my complete competition is out
Speaker:I can't I can't do anything
Speaker:so it's like you have these other expectations
Speaker:and I think we talked about this previously
Speaker:where porn is usually okay
Speaker:unless it becomes an addiction where yeah
Speaker:you watch it so much of one specific kind yeah
Speaker:you can't get or specific person
Speaker:well that's a whole different thing
Speaker:but if you watch porn so much
Speaker:that
Speaker:that's the only way that you can get sexually aroused
Speaker:yeah
Speaker:you've got an in the flesh woman right in front of you
Speaker:but all you wanna do is have sex with a blow up doll
Speaker:cartoon
Speaker:a lot of people have a difficult time achieving orgasm
Speaker:with a real partner
Speaker:and that's a horrible demise for many relationships
Speaker:yeah I'm gonna run through the rest of this list
Speaker:in case one was wondering about the fetishes
Speaker:and then we'll wrap up so have you ever heard of CBT
Speaker:CBT like marijuana no
Speaker:that's so funny
Speaker:I immediately thought cognitive behavioral therapy
Speaker:it's not either of those things
Speaker:why did I think about weed
Speaker:I don't even use weed and you thought about a medical
Speaker:it's from that I love the book Feeling Good
Speaker:and it's about cognitive behavior therapy
Speaker:it's cock and ball torture eww
Speaker:that's a common one yeah
Speaker:is it wait wait
Speaker:does it go into detail
Speaker:if it's a woman enjoying hurting a man
Speaker:or if it's a man enjoying being hurt
Speaker:it says the guy want is for the guy to want it
Speaker:we saw that stuff in the construction store
Speaker:remember the thing you put on your finger
Speaker:that had like the metal wheel and yeah
Speaker:like cock like rings but that were like painful
Speaker:with like the pointy things on the inside
Speaker:I don't need that I don't need cock and ball torture
Speaker:you know what you could call it if it were me
Speaker:you could just call it torture
Speaker:how is that different than masochism
Speaker:well I think isn't masochism
Speaker:didn't we say that
Speaker:I think it's a form of I think masochism
Speaker:I think CBT falls under the umbrella of masochism
Speaker:I think so too
Speaker:mummification oh my God
Speaker:what you
Speaker:a person's wrapped from head to toe like a mummy
Speaker:and you just cut off the render
Speaker:to mobilize for sexual gratification
Speaker:wow
Speaker:do you ever read these and think holy shit
Speaker:I'm super normal or do you read them and think fuck
Speaker:I'm missing out
Speaker:I feel like I'm glad I don't need these things
Speaker:that was creepy yeah
Speaker:some people call it burritoing
Speaker:that's not true impact jailbreaker
Speaker:if I
Speaker:if we were like the first night we're gonna have sex
Speaker:like didn't know what you fucking and I'm like
Speaker:hey swaddle me and you swaddle me
Speaker:it's not what they say
Speaker:when you put a baby in the thing that
Speaker:I feel like that's a different fetish
Speaker:wrap me up in a fucking saran wrap
Speaker:cut a hole so I don't die
Speaker:but immobilize me that would be a deal breaker
Speaker:I feel like I'd be like
Speaker:how many people did you kill before me
Speaker:how about it
Speaker:gets rid of the whole possibility of ever having
Speaker:a quickie right
Speaker:you go here we got five minutes you're like
Speaker:oh mama find me by the time we get it wrapped up
Speaker:all the kids are home it's too much stuff
Speaker:that's fucking crazy I've never heard of that
Speaker:have you I'd never heard of that
Speaker:I have not age
Speaker:play is a form of roleplay performed by adults
Speaker:pertaining to be a different age than they are
Speaker:usually younger but any age fits the Bill
Speaker:see keep it legal though
Speaker:we're legal keep it legal
Speaker:I say it's a 70 year old woman
Speaker:she's like
Speaker:I just Learned I just can drink legally tonight
Speaker:it does say age play though right
Speaker:like the opposite you can do the opposite
Speaker:it says usually younger
Speaker:oh it does
Speaker:usually younger
Speaker:why is that such a you can't move it
Speaker:so appealing to have a younger sexual partner
Speaker:no truly
Speaker:I don't understand what could it be
Speaker:I must say a word incorrectly
Speaker:could it be evolutionarily
Speaker:that you want someone that might be fertile
Speaker:how about that for a fucking excuse for these creeps
Speaker:I don't think so for this one
Speaker:I think this is something pathologically wrong
Speaker:when you're searching underage porn
Speaker:well yeah
Speaker:that's look no
Speaker:but girls who look underage
Speaker:sure I think there's something very
Speaker:very wrong with that certainly
Speaker:impact play involves hitting
Speaker:or being hit with an object in a safe
Speaker:consensual way to drive sexual pleasure
Speaker:in pleasure
Speaker:and create or appreciate a sensation of dominance
Speaker:so we're still like doing like sub types of SM
Speaker:yeah role play
Speaker:role play I have a question
Speaker:civics pray to ask under there
Speaker:I'm dying to ask you for role play
Speaker:but I don't want you to tell me
Speaker:have I ever role play I don't
Speaker:think I want you to answer
Speaker:I feel like I have okay
Speaker:but now I can't think of the example once
Speaker:I really don't think I have
Speaker:maybe once I told you that I thought you look super hot
Speaker:I'm very turned on when I see you at work
Speaker:when you're doing doctor stuff
Speaker:it's oh
Speaker:but that's not role playing cause I am a doctor
Speaker:you brought you mean when I brought my doctor stuff
Speaker:yeah you brought your doctor stuff too
Speaker:uh to New York and you dress like a doctor
Speaker:well
Speaker:yep first of all
Speaker:that was like an extra set of everything
Speaker:cause I keep my work stuff at work
Speaker:cause I'd be gross to bring it home
Speaker:and also gross to bring back to patients
Speaker:if we had fun and stuff oh yeah
Speaker:so what I brought was fun
Speaker:and to me it was like kind of cheesy cause I'm like
Speaker:I'm just coming home after a long shift
Speaker:like a fucking bed and you're like
Speaker:let's get it on I actually really liked it
Speaker:I was surprised next week that I was sized
Speaker:how big the Bill was it was very expensive
Speaker:and I guess
Speaker:the only stologist was in a different network
Speaker:what the fuck man
Speaker:cuckholding this is
Speaker:when one partner watches their lover with someone else
Speaker:and drives pleasure from it
Speaker:I don't understand it's cuckholding
Speaker:c U C K H O L d I N G I don't understand that
Speaker:cuckholding don't like it uh uh
Speaker:I do that's the craziest one
Speaker:I don't I can't get inside someone's yeah
Speaker:I knew a guy friend of mine was comedian and he he
Speaker:this guy and a woman hit on him and they were a couple
Speaker:and they brought him back to their place
Speaker:and he knew it was like a weird situation
Speaker:but he was like ah
Speaker:and when they went back to the place
Speaker:the guy he saw them more than once after
Speaker:this girl was very attractive
Speaker:the guy liked to be in the room a little bit
Speaker:and then they'd start kissing
Speaker:then the guy would leave
Speaker:and he would sleep with the guy's wife
Speaker:and the guy wasn't even there he was outside the room
Speaker:he like knowing it was going on
Speaker:he like knowing what was going on
Speaker:was he listening through the door and masturbating
Speaker:he had his penis out
Speaker:well to each his own
Speaker:we have to go that's interesting to me
Speaker:like that's so like it's quite the opposite
Speaker:I'd be like
Speaker:you're fucking cheated on me and I'd be angry
Speaker:it's quite the opposite I wouldn't even be like
Speaker:okay if you're into it
Speaker:like that is like a huge fucking deal breaker well
Speaker:how about I get jealous of guys you slept with
Speaker:that were 10 years before you met me
Speaker:let alone it's inside the bedroom
Speaker:and we met him at a club
Speaker:I wanna know how long you have
Speaker:to like have sex with someone or know someone before
Speaker:you're like hi by the way
Speaker:I'd like to cut holds later
Speaker:how do you bring it up over dinner
Speaker:do you do you go like
Speaker:man what if the sausage was another guy's dick
Speaker:and I watched you gotta like a lure the lady
Speaker:and so you gotta like wine and diner right
Speaker:certainly wouldn't tell her to go sleep your floor
Speaker:and then tell her you wanna go fuck someone else
Speaker:but also are you saying
Speaker:it's totally wrong if I said I'm into cuck holding
Speaker:why don't you watch me sleep with someone
Speaker:that's very different than me saying I like this thing
Speaker:what do you think about a guy fucking me
Speaker:yeah watch
Speaker:yeah yeah
Speaker:well I'll agree that otherwise
Speaker:it seems like you're like trying to get into like
Speaker:sleeping with other people yes
Speaker:but when you're like no
Speaker:I really am voyeuristic in the way of I want
Speaker:well no
Speaker:that's the wrong term
Speaker:but I want to watch you sex with someone
Speaker:I guess so but man
Speaker:or how do you even like get someone into that
Speaker:like they've never done it before and you like
Speaker:you wanna try it
Speaker:what if you don't like it and it ruins everything
Speaker:then you in the relationship
Speaker:but that sucks
Speaker:what if you have a great relationship and you're like
Speaker:let's try this thing and you do it
Speaker:I could see like a threesome doing that group set
Speaker:like some kind of orgy
Speaker:I could see an orgy ruining everything
Speaker:I honestly think that if you and I went to an orgy
Speaker:it we might break up and never talk again
Speaker:and that'd be like one mistake one and done
Speaker:why Ethan I don't think we would well
Speaker:I don't think we ever would
Speaker:but I don't think
Speaker:I was using as an example of like a great relationship
Speaker:so you can't recover from
Speaker:where you have wonderful communication
Speaker:you love each other you genuinely feel connected
Speaker:and yet you make one mistake and you're done
Speaker:it was I'm thinking sensual like yeah
Speaker:both like let's do it
Speaker:I feel like there's so much shit that would go wrong
Speaker:like the drive home would be horrible
Speaker:1 never done 2
Speaker:I have so many questions so many questions
Speaker:I can barely focus on one beautiful woman
Speaker:I want all my energy there
Speaker:but like how do you know who wants who
Speaker:do you know if the guys want the guys
Speaker:the girls want the girls
Speaker:the girls and the guys want each other
Speaker:who how do you do you just get
Speaker:is it a is it a fucking buffet
Speaker:hmm I don't think go up to them and you're like
Speaker:I'll have a little scoop of this side of this one
Speaker:I'll go back for the soft serve only if I have room
Speaker:yeah and then also the guys gotta pay themselves right
Speaker:the girls can have fun for hours
Speaker:but the guy has to like choose what UNINTER
Speaker:can you imagine you go to this orgy
Speaker:let's say you be paid
Speaker:let's say you pay and it's like for 5 hours
Speaker:you get to go to the orgy
Speaker:can you imagine being the guy
Speaker:just watching your wife
Speaker:fuck people for the other four and a half hours
Speaker:yeah and you're like
Speaker:oh that first person was great
Speaker:now I'm gonna sit here
Speaker:cause I'm unable to get out of here soon
Speaker:like when you're like
Speaker:when your wife's at the craft store
Speaker:you kind of done is it we got everything
Speaker:like how there's so much pent up
Speaker:like excitement until you climax
Speaker:and like the minute or two after of recovery
Speaker:and then you rest but then you're like
Speaker:I'm done yeah
Speaker:where is this guy would have to sit and watch
Speaker:then it even be worse you know what reminds me of
Speaker:you'd have to like
Speaker:wait and not do anything for like hours and hours
Speaker:hours and then go at the very end
Speaker:that's a lot of self control you'd have to
Speaker:it reminds me of if you ever been at a dinner
Speaker:this just happened to me and you are all the stuff
Speaker:and you don't wanna be there all night
Speaker:you're hungry
Speaker:and you wanna eat and go back and maybe do something
Speaker:and you order steaks and it takes a little while
Speaker:but it's not too bad
Speaker:and then someone joins your group and the waiters like
Speaker:would you like to order something
Speaker:and they're like oh
Speaker:actually yeah
Speaker:I'll have a Tomahawk and you're like
Speaker:we fucking it just started over
Speaker:I'm full I don't wanna watch someone eat a steak
Speaker:not a great analogy well
Speaker:I always thought it was really interesting
Speaker:people who worked at a restaurant
Speaker:if they were like yeah
Speaker:you were the best restaurant ever
Speaker:you get free food all the time
Speaker:but they're like oh
Speaker:I just ate I'm full of shit
Speaker:and I have to smell food for the next five hours yeah
Speaker:it's gonna be difficult I remember at Arby's
Speaker:I loved roast beef at the whole time
Speaker:never never got old
Speaker:never got old and I had no money
Speaker:is that I was bodybuilding at the time
Speaker:and so I was eating like five regulars
Speaker:couple giants all day long
Speaker:I was ketoing oh
Speaker:so you were just eating the meat
Speaker:are you putting sauce on it
Speaker:no oh
Speaker:this one time you never got sick of it
Speaker:I used to steal sandwiches
Speaker:but a lot of times it was cause they made them yeah
Speaker:by mistake so maybe I took maybe once in a while to end
Speaker:this one time I took a
Speaker:I took a giant Arby's sandwich
Speaker:which is just meat that's all it is
Speaker:there's no sauce but you can't just eat a sandwich
Speaker:right so I go in the bathroom and I lock the door
Speaker:it's a Warner one seater and I take the sandwich
Speaker:I'm about to eat it and I look over in the toilet
Speaker:someone shit the exact
Speaker:it was like they ate a there was a huge
Speaker:there was like a giant shit and it was the same shit
Speaker:yeah why did you eat in a toilet
Speaker:you have to cause I was still
Speaker:I was eating a sandwich that they probably could have
Speaker:stealing it so you went to where else would I go
Speaker:bathroom it's gross
Speaker:I don't know where else to go to eat stone sandwiches
Speaker:not in the bathroom you know
Speaker:the most popular place to eat a stone sandwich
Speaker:is about I doubt that I feel like you just go out back
Speaker:but this poop it was like a sneak exhibit
Speaker:then how did you eat the meat
Speaker:if you're looking at shit
Speaker:threw it away never mind
Speaker:I said never mind
Speaker:what is the grossest story you have at Arby's
Speaker:grossest Derby story
Speaker:we're gonna put a pin in that for next time
Speaker:because we have to we had to wrap this shit up
Speaker:and we're still gonna get the broken penis oh
Speaker:gross stories and x
Speaker:someone has an X that's a certain type
Speaker:and whether that matters we'll see you next time
Speaker:coming up on the next episode of afraid to ask
Speaker:do you know the honest truth yeah
Speaker:one second you know
Speaker:my favorite thing is the fact that
Speaker:I'm laughing so hard and you're so on amused
Speaker:I think that that's all of men versus women
Speaker:that that struck me so funny
Speaker:I actually know that it's real
Speaker:because I heard this story before we had a podcast
Speaker:hmm
Speaker:anyway I
Speaker:I don't know I think also I'm used to like
Speaker:performing surgery and afterwards
Speaker:not letting patients go
Speaker:until they've had a bowel movement
Speaker:or past gas because oftentimes
Speaker:the medicines we give cause constipation
Speaker:especially opiates for pain control
Speaker:so after surgery
Speaker:you wanna make sure that the gut motility is there
Speaker:before you discharge someone
Speaker:so they don't go home and have a bowel obstruction
Speaker:so a lot of times I'm like hey
Speaker:you can get out of here soon as you fucking fart
Speaker:and it's totally serious yeah
Speaker:so like it's a it's a thing
Speaker:and then someone will fart and you're like yeah
Speaker:it's like a genuinely like
Speaker:so I don't know can I miss something to you
Speaker:I didn't even care about that medical question
Speaker:I want to play the fart noise
Speaker:oh you have a fart
Speaker:but you had a great answer so I'm glad we did it
